


Easy as Pirozhki

by callasyndra



Series: Podium Family [1]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga, Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Families can be chosen, M/M, Major spoilers for Fullmetal Alchemist, Mutual Pining, Panic Attacks, Skating injury, Slice of Life, Studio Ghibli References, growth spurts, teen shenanigans
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-29
Updated: 2017-10-01
Packaged: 2018-10-12 16:55:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 35,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10495398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/callasyndra/pseuds/callasyndra
Summary: In which Yuuri K. and Yuri P. are Fullmetal Alchemist fanboys and Victor is not coping well with being overwhelmed.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Bear Your Soul on the Ice](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9092290) by [SassySalchow (diedraechin)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/diedraechin/pseuds/SassySalchow). 



> I'm using Yuuri for Yuri Katsuki because it's easier for my brain when transitioning between the two Yuris. Also, I like using Katsudon as his nickname rather than Pork Cutlet Bowl because it's quicker to type and is closer to his last name of Katsuki.
> 
> If you haven't read/seen any Fullmetal Alchemist then you may want to wait on reading this before diving in. There are major spoilers for FMA in the first few sentences, so don't read if you haven't seen FMA and want to.

A/N

I found Yuri on Ice when [Tierfal](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Tierfal) posted a fanfic about it.  At the time I was significantly depressed and needed something to help take my mind away from my current situation.  Really wasn't expecting the emotional salve of this figure skating anime, but that's what I got.  After reading [Sassy Salchow's](http://archiveofourown.org/users/diedraechin/pseuds/SassySalchow) BYSOTI I finally figured out how I wanted to write this thing.  So everybody go and read their stuff because it's fabulous.  Hope you enjoy this!

 

 

“Whatever, Katsudon.  You’re not gonna convince me Ed shouldn’t have had his Dad get Al back instead of giving up his alchemy,” Yuri Plisetsky muttered in derision.  The younger skater was helping his now rinkmate up the stairs to Victor’s apartment after the Japan nationals.  Since Yuuri Katsuki was moving in with Victor Nikiforov soon it made sense for him to come back to the apartment.  They had approximately a month before Victor and Yurio would be attending the European Championships as competitors.  Once World Championships were over in April, Victor and Yuuri would look at moving into a larger apartment since they wanted Yurio to be able to stay over occasionally, but for now they were making do with Victor’s single bedroom apartment.

          Yuuri had a small frown on his face as he debated the ending of Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood with Yurio.  “Ed wanted to get Al back without having to use human transmutation, Yurio.  It was incredibly important to him; how do you not get that?”

          Yurio banged on Victor’s apartment door.  “Victor!  We’re back open the door,” he yelled before turning back to keep debating the current topic.  “It’s bullshit.  Alchemy was Ed’s life and he just gave it up when he didn’t have to.  Are you really telling me you liked that he just gave it away?” Yurio was incredulous.

          As the door opened behind Yurio and Victor peeked out, Yuuri tilted his head to the side.  “It’s not about me liking it.  It was Ed’s choice and his brother was more important to him than his alchemy was.  Ed loved alchemy, but it was also the source of his guilt.  Al would never have lost his body in the first place if Ed hadn’t wanted to use alchemy to try and bring their mom back.”

          Victor’s face grew confused as he tried to follow the conversation they were having.  It didn’t help that Yurio was throwing his hands up in frustration and almost shouting, “Yeah?  Well none of that shit would have happened if their dad hadn’t fucked off in the first place!”  Turning around Yurio paced into Victor’s apartment as the older man quickly moved out of his way. 

          Eyebrows raised, Victor glanced questioningly over at Yuuri before smiling down at him.  “Hello, Yuuri.  I missed you,” he murmured quietly before lifting a hand to Yuuri’s face.  Silently he ran his thumb over Yuuri’s cheekbone before leaning forward for a quick hello kiss.

          Smiling, Yuuri placed his own hand over Victor’s for a moment.  They stepped into a hug that didn’t last long as Yurio began calling from the living room, “What are you idiots doing?  Get out of the hallway if you’re going to be disgusting.”

          With a sigh Yuuri pulled away from Victor to grab his rolling suitcase.  Victor picked up his back pack and pulled it into the living room behind Yuuri while Yurio collapsed onto the couch.    

After the Grand Prix Finals, and the resulting chaos from Victor announcing his return to skating while remaining Yuuri’s coach, it had been an intense few days.  With only a week and a couple of days before the Russian nationals, Yakov had predictably screamed at Victor that he couldn’t possibly be in two places at once since both the Russian and Japan nationals took place at the same time.  Victor had turned to Yuuri with the intention of waiting until the next season to come back only to run into Yuuri’s stubborn streak.  Yuuri flatly stated that if Victor didn’t go to the Russian nationals then he was retiring.  Victor pleading that he couldn’t be with Yuuri at the Japan nationals didn’t have the desired effect as Yuuri pointed out there were going to be competitions that Victor couldn’t be at and they were just going to have to deal with it.

          Yurio had glared at the three of them before quietly picking up his cell phone.  After a quick text back and forth to Yuuko he was able to get Minako’s phone number.  Quickly making a phone call Yurio asked if Minako would be willing to accompany Yuuri to the Japan nationals.  After her confirmation, he made his way over to the ongoing argument on the ice and cleared his throat. 

          Three sets of eyes glanced over at him while he gazed at them in boredom.  “Katsudon is right.  He has to learn to skate without you or this isn’t going to work, Victor.  And it needs to work because I’m going to kick both of your asses at the Worlds.  So, here’s what we do.  Yakov will go with Victor, Mila, and Georgi to the Russian nationals and Minako will meet Katsudon at the Japan nationals.  Since I won the gold at the Grand Prix Final I’m already qualified for Russia at the Worlds, so I’ll go with Katsudon.  Victor has to get his ass to the Worlds and he’ll worry if someone isn’t with Katsudon.  So.”

          Yakov was gazing at him suspiciously, while Victor was beginning to look relieved.  Yuuri looked more relaxed, but was now eyeing Yurio with some serious contemplation. 

          “You should go to the Russian nationals, Yurio,” Yuuri stated quietly.  “I’ve got to prove I can do this on my own and while I appreciate the offer, Yakov isn’t going to want you to miss nationals.”

          Yuri narrowed his eyes at both Yurri Katsuki and his coach.  “Yakov needs to focus on Victor, not me.  And I’m going to keep your ass in line, Katsudon.  None of this falling apart.  You get anxious and I’ll walk with you and keep the others away.  You brought Victor back to the ice so now you’re part of the family.”

          Yakov turned away momentarily to mumble some frustrated Russian while the two Yuris stared at each other.  Tentatively, Victor moved toward his fiancé.  “Actually, that’s not a bad idea.  The two of you work well together and if you get anxious, Yurio can help you with your jumps.”

          Yuuri had a troubled look on his face, but finally nodded.  “Fine, but only for nationals.  Any other competitions we’ll work it differently.  Yurio needs to concentrate on his own career.”

          Yakov had pulled out his cell phone and was speaking to someone while the other three were talking.  Once Yuuri had agreed, Yurio dropped his aggressive stance and turned to look mockingly at Victor.  “So, what do you think?  Will you be able to skate without him, Victor?”

          A small blush graced Victor’s face and he smiled ruefully.  “I honestly don’t know.”

          Yuuri’s mouth fell open in shock while Yurio bent over snickering.  Yakov turned back around with an air of decision.  “Okay, here’s what we do.  Lilia has said she will go with both Yuris and meet up with Minako.  But after nationals we will have to figure something else out.”

          Victor had been working on choreography for new routines, but even for him getting something together in a weeks’ time was extremely difficult.  Yuuri and Yurio spent the week looking at the skating competition schedule for the rest of the Winter and Spring, practicing their own programs and critiquing each other, and to both of their surprise, bonding over Fullmetal Alchemist.

          At one point when Victor had been incredibly frustrated and had started yelling back at Yakov, gesticulating wildly with his arms, Yurio had snickered.  “God, he looks just as aggravated and upset as Al did after Scar tried to kill Ed that first time,” he laughed, shaking his head.

          Yuuri frowned, blinked, then turned his head to gape at Yurio.  “Wait, you know Fullmetal Alchemist?!”

          Yurio froze, turned to face Yuuri head on and asked wide-eyed, “Manga or anime?”

          “Both!”  Yuuri grinned at Yurio who glanced to make sure no one was watching them. 

          “I’ve got the English dub of Brotherhood we can take to Japan,” he muttered quietly.   
          Following Yurio’s lead, Yuuri did a quick visual sweep of the rink as well.  “I’ve got the entire series of ’03 and Brotherhood, plus the manga,” he confided with a quiet smile.

          They became so caught up in talking about the antics of the Elric brothers they both failed to notice when Yakov finally quit yelling at Victor to notice neither of them were skating.

          “Yuri! Katsuki! Why are neither of you skating?” Yakov yelled at them balefully, earning startled jumps from both younger men.

          Victor skated past, blowing a kiss at Yuuri before turning to continue working on his program.  Mila had been standing next to Georgi watching the two Yuris with a small smile on her face.

          “I don’t care what Yurotchka says, he likes the other Yuuri,” she told Georgi quietly.

          Georgi hmmed quietly while texting his new girlfriend.  “Those two will have to keep themselves occupied for a while until Victor is up to Yakov’s standards.  It’s good to see Yuri not looking pissed off all the time,” he said with a glance over at the two who were now working on step sequences.

~*~

          Victor had to fly out before the Yuris with the Russia figure skating team, and the god of skating was not handling being parted from his fiancé well.  He held Yurri’s hand until boarding was called, then had Yuuri stand next to him in the line until the plane actually started boarding.  Mila thought the two were terribly cute, but Yurio was ready to pull his hair out.  He kept seeing the glances other people were throwing their way and was beside himself trying not to scream at those other people.  It was none of their business what his family members did as long as they kept their clothes on.  And there was no alcohol in the vicinity so Victor and Yuuri wouldn’t be getting naked anytime soon.  Why the fuck couldn’t people just leave them alone to say their goodbyes?

          Yuuri saw the line beginning to move and pulled Victor’s hand to his mouth to kiss his ring one last time.  The platinum haired man couldn’t quite hide the look on his face as Yuuri stepped back and smiled at him.  Yakov threw a supportive arm over Victor’s shoulders and nodded at Yuuri.  “We’ll be in touch,” Yakov added as he pushed Victor forward.

          Yuuri waited until Victor had gone far enough down the boarding ramp that he could no longer see Yuuri before turning to walk over to Yurio.

          “How long do you think before he texts you?” Yurio asked.

          Yuuri smiled tiredly and said, “Right about…now.”  His phone was vibrating with an alert.

          “Well we’ve got another day and a half before our flight.  Want to watch some FMA before ballet practice?”  Yurio was satisfied he didn’t sound too eager.

          Yuuri texted Victor back before nodding and smiling.  “That sounds great.  Thanks, Yurio.”

          Yurio side-eyed the older skater before clearing his throat.  “If you want I can stay at Victor’s place tonight.  We could binge some FMA tonight and then you can pack after I leave in the morning.  We’re gonna have to hit the ice tomorrow and then fly out in the afternoon, but we have time to watch some if you want.”

          A knowing look crossed Yuuri’s face, but he made sure to keep looking straight ahead and not at the boy walking next to him.  “I don’t want to trouble you…”

          Yurio made a face out of the windows they passed on the way back to the front of the airport.  “Nah it’s good.  Lilia would just have me do stupid stuff if I stayed with her.  Besides, no one else around here knows anything about FMA.”

          Yuuri smiled and looked down at his phone to text Victor.  “We can do that.”

 **Yuuri** :  Yurio is trying to distract me so I won’t be upset tonight.

 **Victor** :  Yakov is doing the same thing.  This sucks.

 **Victor** :  Are you sure I can’t make my comeback next year?

 **Yuuri** :  Our deal was we both skate.

 **Victor** :  Yah, I know.  It still sucks.

 **Yuuri** :  It sucks right now.  But I’ll get to go with you to European

Championships and then we’ll compete at the Four Continents.

 **Yuuri** :  It will be worth it.  And you **will** kiss my gold medal.

 **Victor** :  Can we skype tonight?

 **Yuuri** :  Of course we can.  Try to get some sleep on the plane.

          Yuuri threw a glance at Yurio as they exited the airport and walked over to the parking garage where Lilia would pick them up.  “Victor wants to skype later, but the FMA watch sounds great.”

          Yurio stretched his arms over his head and yawned.  “He’s going to be a pain in the ass this whole time.  You know that, right?”

          Yurri grinned.  “Who would have thought Victor would be the one who pines in our relationship?” he teased.

          Yurio snorted.  “Oh, my God, you should have seen him after the banquet last year.  Wouldn’t shut up about you.  Kept looking at all the pics on his phone at practice.  Yakov threatened to break it once when Victor was being melodramatic.  It’s a damn good thing Yuuko’s girls put that video of you online or I would’ve had to come get you or something.”

          Yuuri turned his head to hide his quiet laugh.  Yurio grinned up at him for a moment before Lilia pulled up.  “Come on Katsudon, time to get a few things before we fly out.”

~*~

          Yuuri was surprised to admit to himself that tonight had been fun.  He did miss Victor, but ballet and hanging out with Yurio had been great.  And this was good practice for how the next few months would be, because he and Victor had gotten spoiled by spending all his training time together.  Yuuri had set his laptop up on the far end of the couch so that when Victor Skyped him he’d know. 

          The app woke up and began the ringing notification that a new call was coming in.  Yurio glanced over and muttered, “I’m surprised he waited this long.”

          Yuuri grabbed his laptop and brought it over so both he and Yurio could wave at a glum looking Victor.  “Hi, Victor.  Did you just get in?”

          Victor’s tired eyes looked them both over.  “Yes, Yakov put us in a room together because he’s worried about me.  He’s out finishing dinner with Mila and Georgi, but I wasn’t that hungry so I came back early.”

          Yuuri and Yurio exchanged glances.  “Victor, you have to eat,” Yuuri said quietly.

          Victor sent him a shadow of his normal smile.  “I made myself eat something, Yuuri.  I wouldn’t be a good coach to you if I didn’t take care of myself, now would I?”

          Yuuri worried his bottom lip while Yurio leaned into the screen.  “I’m making sure Katsudon doesn’t implode, but that means you have to hold up your end Victor.  No alcohol this trip, yeah?  You’ll see each other in about a week, it’ll be fine.”

          Victor left off from looking over Yuuri’s face to look at Yurio.  “Thank you for helping us, Yuri.  It means a lot.”

          Yurio immediately blushed and looked away, grumbling in Russian.  Yuuri sent him a smile before picking up the laptop and heading into Victor’s bedroom.  “I’ll be back in a bit, Yurio,” he called over his shoulder.

          Closing the door behind him, Yuuri walked over to Victor’s bed.  He sat down with his back against the backboard.  “I miss you,” he said softly to the beautiful man looking at him from the screen.

          Tiredly, Victor smiled at him before tilting his head into his palm.  Victor had set his laptop up on the desk in his hotel room and was sitting down in front of it.  “If I’d known how hard this would be I would have just retired from amateur skating and gone straight into professional competitions.  Is this really so important to you?” Victor asked quietly.

          “Yes, but if not if it’s going to make you miserable,” Yuuri answered.  He swallowed and smiled a bit ruefully.  “I think we got spoiled in Hasetsu getting to spend all that time together.”

          Victor’s smile brightened a bit.  “It wasn’t only Hasetsu, Yuuri,” he practically purred.

          Getting Yuuri to blush had been Victor’s goal, and with that accomplished he relaxed a bit.  “I love you,” he said quietly to the man who’d come to mean so very much to him.  He’d agreed to come back to amateur figure skating simply because it meant so very much to Yuuri.  Now they were going to have to find a way to make the time apart work for them.

          “I love you, too, Vitya,” Yuuri whispered.  “We’ll get to see each other again in about a week and we can stay here in your apartment before the European Championships.  I can’t wait to get back here and spend time with you in your home.”

          Victor sent him a mildly scolding look.  “Yuuri my home is wherever you are.  But it will be nice to have you at the apartment with me.  Is Yurio keeping you entertained?”

          “He’d never admit it, but we’ve been having a blast,” Yuuri said with a grin.  “There’s this anime we both really like that we’re going to take with us when we go to the Japan nationals so we can rewatch it.  And I think Lilia and Minako are going to have us keep working on ballet while we’re there.  They both seem to think Yurio is more focused with me around.”

          “Well that’s because he respects you, darling.  He sees you get hyper-focused and feels like he needs to do the same.  And don’t tell him I said this, but Yurio is so very jealous of your stamina.  You can practice for much longer periods of time than he can.”  Victor paused to watch Yuuri process that before seeing the wicked glint in Yuuri’s eyes.

          “He’s not the only one who appreciates my stamina,” Yuuri stated in a low voice, just to see Victor’s pupils dilate.  Which they did because how could they not when his Yuuri spoke in such a way to him?

          There was a noise behind Victor, who immediately began to pout.  “Yakov’s back,” he said sourly.  “I’ll try calling you tomorrow, or would you rather call me?”

          Yuuri considered as they’d both be practicing tomorrow.  “How about I text you and see if you’re at a point where we can talk?”

          “Yes, I think Yakov would appreciate that,” Victor said with an emphatic glance over his shoulder.  “Good night, Yuuri.”  He kissed the ring on his finger before reaching out to place his hand on the image of Yuuri on his laptop.

          Yuuri swallowed as he’d gotten a bit teary at the image of Victor kissing his ring.  “Good night, Victor.  I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”  He waited until Victor had moved his hand to lean forward and place a kiss on his computer screen.  Victor sent an equally watery smile his way before signing off.

          With a bit of a sniffle, Yuuri signed out of his Skype account and turned off his laptop.  Making his way back into the living room, he met Yurio’s questioning glance.  “Victor okay?” Yurio asked.

          Yuuri sighed and sat down on the couch with him.  “He will be.  This is tougher than I thought it would be on him.”

          Yurio looked up at the television before side-eyeing Yuuri.  “And you?  Are you okay?”

          Yuuri looked down at the ring on his finger before nodding.  “I miss him, but I’m doing okay.  Was he really so lonely before he became my coach?”

          Yurio pursed his mouth in thought.  “Victor doesn’t let people in easily.  He doesn’t have many friends because he sold his soul to the ice years ago, and most people can’t stand to be around someone so devoted to it.  You make friends much easier than he does, you know.  I think you’ve helped him with that.  As far as I know the only skater besides the Russian team Victor spoke with was Christophe Giacometti.  There really wasn’t room for him to make friends when he was busy reinventing himself every season.”

          The blond turned to look him in the eye.  “I can tell you this now because I know how much he means to you.  Part of the reason I came to Hasetsu in the first place was to protect Victor.  I was pissed off at him because he’d fucked off and left all of us, but he had been so miserable I just wanted to make sure you didn’t hurt him.  And I wanted to see where you trained, too.  So, it all worked out.  And now we’re all training together, so the rest of this year is going to be awesome once you can both figure out how to stop pining.”

          While Yuuri blinked at the boy sitting next to him, said boy turned to start another episode of Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood.  “And if you tell anyone I said all that I will kick your ass, Katsudon.”

          Yuuri sat for a few minutes processing what Yurio had just told him before getting up to get some of the snacks they’d bought earlier.  Silently handing some of the chips Yurio had picked out over to him, Yuuri said quietly, “We’re lucky to have you here, Yurio.”

          The tips of the boy’s ears went red, but all he said was, “Whatever.  Just get a medal at nationals.”

 

 

Here are the dates I'm basing this fic off of:

 

2016 Grand Prix Final – Thursday December 8 - Sunday December 11

2016 Russian Nationals 20-26 December

2016 Japan Nationals 22-25 December

2017 European Championships January 25-29

2017 Four Continents 16-19 February

2017 World Figure Skating Championships 29 March – April 2

 

Also, here are some other great Yuri On Ice [fanfics](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/FanficRecs/YuriOnIce).

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can we all just take a moment and be in awe of how much Mitsuro Kubo was able to make these characters really stand out in just 12 episodes? If her characters weren't as fleshed out as they are this chapter would have been completely unbelievable. However, because she's such an amazing writer, this actually worked.

          The two Yuris shared at room at the Japan nationals, which provided them with the advantages of not having to deal with either Lilia or Minako after a night of drinking.  Yuuri had gone to see when their illustrious coaches wanted to practice ballet that day only to receive a baleful glare from Minako, who mumbled “Later!” at the door.

          On the way back to his room, Yuuri texted Victor to let him know he was up.  The time difference was making talking or Skyping difficult, but they were both texting each other every chance they got.  Victor had also been sending selfies of himself (fully clothed since he was rooming with Yakov) so Yuuri was doing his best to return the favor.  While they both looked tired in their pictures, they were both coping.  It helped to see that they were both doing well enough without the other there.

          Yurio was awake, but hadn’t bothered to get out of bed yet when Yuuri returned.  Yuuri sent him a small smile before grabbing the room service menu.  “Breakfast?” he asked the younger man.

          Yurio snorted.  “Yah.  What are you planning while the dance divas deal with their hangover?”

          Yuuri worried his lip a bit before turning to look out the window.  “I think I’ll go for a run.  The public practice isn’t until this evening, but I need to get some energy out.  And since ballet is going to have to wait, I need to do something else.”

          Yurio flopped himself over on the bed.  “Let me see the menu.”  Quickly assessing the choices, he glanced over at Yuuri who was holding up better than he’d thought on this trip.

          “What do you want, Katsudon?”  After Yuuri told him, Yurio nodded.  “Okay, you order the food and then we’ll go out for a run.”

          Yurio flopped back on the bed and idly listened as Yuuri ordered the food.  It wasn’t often he heard Yuuri speak in his native tongue, but even just listening he could hear how much more at ease Yuuri was over the phone.  Normally he’d have to be speaking to Victor to sound this relaxed.  Yurio vaguely wondered if Victor had decided to try and learn Japanese at some point since he already knew a few languages.

          After hanging up the phone, Yuuri looked at the younger skater.  “You don’t have to come with me.  What do you usually do the day before a competition?”

          Yurio smirked.  “Usually I’ll hang out with Mila or just check Twitter and Instagram.  But running sounds better since we can hold it over Lilia and Minako.”

          Yuuri grabbed his running clothes to change into before stopping to look at Yurio again.  “Look I appreciate this, but you don’t have to take care of me.  I’m used to being on my own.”

          Yurio glared and sat up.  Pointing at Yuuri he bit out, “You don’t have to do everything by yourself.  You’ve got friends and family, but you never let them help you.  So just deal with me going running with you, Katsudon.”

          The troubled look on Yuuri’s face faded as he thought about that.  “Alright.  Will you grab the food if it comes while I’m changing?”

          Still glaring, Yurio nodded.  He watched while the older skater went to the restroom change before letting his shoulders slump a bit.  How did someone as amazing as Yuuri really think it was a bother for people to spend time with him?  He was beginning to understand why Victor worried about his fiancé as much as he did.

~*~

          The day had gone well for the Japan team (Yurio laughed to himself that he was now thinking of their whole team as two since they were split at the moment) with Yuuri and Victor checking in with each other throughout the day.  Lilia had even complemented the Yuris at one point during ballet practice, which was practically unheard of.  Then again, Yurio knew he was concentrating harder than he normally would on all the movements because Yuuri made it all look so **easy**. 

          While Victor and Yuuri had been on the phone before the public practice, Yurio had grabbed his laptop and started looking up what all this anxiety business was.  He’d not really had a chance to talk to Victor about it since it had been all practice with Yakov screaming almost continuously while they’d been in Russia.  He wanted to have some idea what to do if Yuuri freaked out while they were here in Japan.  Minako was here and he’d been watching how she handled him, which seemed to be mostly humor, loads of encouragement, and careful critique, but there hadn’t been any outright panic yet.  Victor would never let him hear the end of it if he dropped the ball on this and Yuuri lost all the confidence he’d gained this season.

          Thankfully the phone call lasted quite a while, which gave Yurio time to see that anxiety was often linked with depression.  While he never talked about it, Yurio had dealt with some of both while he was growing up as a skater.  Never on the levels Yuuri dealt with, but having his grandpa as his only emotional support growing up hadn’t been easy.  Yakov didn’t really count since he never really let his role as coach bleed into any other role, but there had been times when Yurio wondered why he was doing this.  His parents didn’t care, Yakov only ever yelled, and his grandpa could only do so much since he had to work full time.

          Hearing phone call come to an end, Yurio quickly shut his laptop.  Yuuri had a wistful look on his face, which wasn’t surprising as he and Victor were still new in this whole relationship thing.  Even with the engagement (which really?  WTF was that even necessary?!) Yuuri never took any of his time with Victor for granted.

          Feeling the tips of his ears redden and wanting to distract himself, Yurio cleared this throat.  “We’re on down time now, yeah?”

          “Yes, we can relax now.  Did you have something in mind, Yurio?”

          “Which of the FMA did you bring?  You said you have all of it…”

          Yuuri tapped his index finger against his lip in thought.  “Let’s see, I brought the first two volumes of ’03 and the OVAs for Brotherhood.  I didn’t know what you’ve seen other than Brotherhood, so I brought just a couple of other things.”

          Yurio shrugged.  “I’ve seen all of Brotherhood and the movie, but we could watch some of the other one?  Is it very different from Brotherhood?”  He glanced over to see Yuuri with a strange look on his face.  Blinking, he asked, “What?”

          “You haven’t seen Conqueror of Shamballa, have you?” Yuuri was staring at him intently.  Yurio struggled against the urge to squirm because **why was he looking at him like that?!**

          “Eh?  What is Conqueror of…what?”

          “Oh, my God, you’ve only seen the Brotherhood movie, haven’t you?  I don’t know why they tied that thing to Brotherhood, it has **nothing** to do with Brotherhood and they fucked up Ed’s eyes.” 

          Yurio felt his eyebrows climbing as he gaped at a ranting Yuuri.  He’d never seen the older skater so passionate about anything before.  The ranting turned into pacing and gesticulating.  After the initial shock, Yurio just sat back and enjoyed the show.  Eventually Yuuri wound down and Yurio grinned at him.

          “You have strong feelings about that movie.  Is the other one any better?”

          Yuuri snorted.  “We’ve got to catch you up.  Is it **any better**?  Yes.  It completely makes up for the second movie which had nothing to do with Brotherhood’s plot.  The irony being, it was the first movie.  Okay, you have to watch the whole series before you can watch COS or you’re going to be really confused.”  Walking over to his bag, Yuuri began digging for the FMA volumes he’d brought.

          Yurio flopped back on his bed and allowed himself a small smile.  This trip was turning out to be a real treasure trove.

~*~

          Yuuri had set his alarm for 0400 so he could get up and watch Victor’s free skate from the livestream on Ice Network.  He was doing his best to be quiet and not wake up Yurio, but then he heard the younger skater’s phone going off.  Groggily, Yurio slapped at his phone before mumbling, “Fucking time difference.”

          Yuuri already had his laptop set up so Yurio pulled himself and his blanket over to Yuuri’s bed to watch with him.  Normally Yuuri wasn’t a morning person, but when it came to Victor, Yuuri would adjust to anything.  Yurio stifled a yawn as they watched the skater before Victor finishing up his free skate. 

          Yuuri smiled softly then glanced over at Yurio.  “I’m surprised you wanted to get up for this.”

          Yurio kept his eyes on the screen as he shrugged.  “Knew you were gonna get up and watch him, so I got up too.  Wouldn’t have been able to sleep through it anyway.”

          Yuuri’s phone went off with a text message that he quickly answered.  Yurio snorted at seeing the image of Victor on the screen checking his own phone before handing it off to Yakov.  These two idiots just couldn’t not reach out to each other.

          The announcer said Victor’s name as he quickly skated a loop around the rink before taking his place on the ice.

          Yuuri watched breathlessly as his fiancé began to skate.  He’d waited what felt like years to see Victor compete again, even though he knew it was only months.  It became immediately apparent this was a different Victor.  A more expressive one, if that was even possible.  Victor had always been technically proficient, hardly ever missing any of his jumps.  But the emotion showing now was new – it was the real Victor instead of the persona he’d recreated every year.

          At one point in the program Yurio began cursing.  Yuuri felt tears in his eyes at the sheer emotion he was feeling seeing this Victor, his Victor, showing the world the real him.

          In frustration Yurio grit his teeth.  “This is all your fault, Katsudon!  He’s going to be impossible to beat now – look at that!”

          With a snarky grin, Yuuri turned to face the younger skater.  “Now, Yurio.  Impossible is relative.  We’re just going to have to up our game, that’s all.  You help me with jumps and I’ll help you with foot sequences and expression.”

          Determinedly, Yurio nodded once.  “Yah.  We’ll beat his ass, Katsudon.  But you call him first and tell him how good he did.  I’m going back to bed,” he mumbled before moving to said bed and covering his head with his blanket.

          Yurio fell back asleep listening to Yuuri talk quietly to Victor.  As soon as he’d gotten out of the kiss & cry, Victor had picked up his phone for Yuuri’s call.  The quiet murmuring was soothing in a way Yurio would never admit.  Slowly Yurio’s body relaxed and fell into deep breaths.

          Yuuri glanced over at the sleeping boy and smiled.  “Yurio’s proud of you, too,” he said softly.

          “Really, how’d you get that out of him?” Victor asked curiously.

          “I listened to what he wasn’t saying,” Yuuri said.  “He really looks up to you as a skater.”

          “Hmmm.  I’m not the only one he looks up to.  You do know you’re the reason he pushed himself so hard, don’t you Yuuri?”

          Contemplatively, Yuuri leaned back against the headboard.  “I think we all inspire each other.  I never would’ve reached the level I’m at now without you to inspire me, and Yurio is amazing.  It’s hard to believe we’re all training together now.”

          Yuuri could hear Victor’s smile through the phone.  “I’m only surprised it took us so long to make it happen.  You make the impossible look easy, my Yuuri.”

          Yuuri felt the blush but only laughed softly into the phone.  “I can’t wait to see you again.”

          Victor sighed.  “I love you so much.  You were right though, we needed this distance.  It will help us to appreciate when we’re together.  How are you feeling about your short program tonight?”

          Yuuri thought about it before answering.  “I’m doing okay, actually.  Minami was at the practice last night and we’re all going out for food after the short program.  Yurio wasn’t sure about going, but I’m dragging him along.  He’s almost as bad as you are at hanging out with the other skaters.”

          Victor laughed.  “That should show you what a good influence you are on us, Yuuri.  We’d be lost and grumpy without you in our lives.”

          “I never would have believed I’d have another family to care so much about until I met you, Victor.  Do you have any idea how much all of this means to me?”  Yuuri couldn’t help the tearful smile on his face.

          “Yes, my love.  What we’ve made means the world to me, too.  I’m going to get off the phone now so you can get some rest.  I love you, Yuuri.”

          Yuuri yawned.  “Love you, too.  Congrats on your gold medal, Victor.  I’ll text you when I wake back up, okay?”

          “Get some more sleep, darling.  I have to go see what Yakov wants now,” Victor stated sourly.

          After hanging up with Victor, Yuuri snuggled back into his bed.  Sleeping without Victor was hard, but he was coping remarkably well considering.  His alarm had been reset for 1030 and he knew he needed more rest.  Relaxing, he slowly fell back asleep.

~*~

          After getting off the phone call with Yuuri, Victor turned to see Yakov advancing on him.  He wasn’t expecting his coach to take his arm and guide him quickly away from the ice.  Nor was he expecting Yakov to hand him a packed bag, a travel itinerary, and a smaller bag with clothes for him to change into.

          “What?” Victor began in confusion, only to be interrupted. 

          “Hurry up, Vitya, you have to be at the airport in 45 minutes to make your flight,” Yakov said.  When Victor just stared blankly, Yakov sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.  “Do you want to get to Japan in time for Yuuri’s short program or not?”

          After that the time passed quickly.  Once he was changed and Yakov was driving Victor to the airport, Yakov explained how Lilia had noticed there was just enough of a time window between Victor’s free skate and Yuuri’s short program that he might make it in time.  Lilia had looked at the dates and schedules of both Nationals competitions and thought it was possible for Victor to arrive in Japan and stay long enough to attend Yuuri’s free skate.  She’d brought this up to Yakov, who was reluctant until Lilia reminded him of the influence Yuuri had inadvertently had on the Russian skating team.  Lilia had then spelled out the travel itinerary for Yakov so he could book the travel plans for Victor.  This had all taken place before either skater left for their respective competition, but both Lilia and Yakov (along with Minako) had decided it was best to let Yuuri and Victor focus on their own competitions.

          There wasn’t much room for any delays, and Yakov explained they still weren’t sure Victor would make it in time to see Yuuri’s short program, but he’d definitely have time to see the free skate before having to fly back to Russia.  Yakov had already informed the Russian figure skating committee that Victor would skate last in the exhibition so he could honor his coaching responsibility to Yuuri.  While not thrilled, the committee couldn’t argue with a coach’s responsibility, so Victor was getting ready to board an airplane.

          “Does Yuuri know I’m coming?” he asked Yakov breathlessly as he handed his identification to the airline check in.

          “Neither of them know yet.  Lilia has informed Minako, and she’s going to tell Yuri, but not until she gets a chance to speak to him privately.  Minako said it might be best if Katsuki doesn’t know you’re coming until after the short program.  He’s apparently very focused and she doesn’t want to disturb that.”

          Victor nodded in understanding and agreement.  “I’ll see you in a couple of days, and Yakov?”  The older man turned to meet his gaze and Victor grinned at him.  “Thank you.  Really, this is the nicest thing you could have done for either of us.”

          Yakov grunted.  “Katsuki has turned you into a better skater.  I’m only doing what I would for any other coach who needed to get to their pupil.”

          Victor grinned and took off for the security check in.  In roughly 14 hours he would see his Yuuri again and he couldn’t wait.

~*~

          While Victor was flying from Koltsovo Airport in Yekaterinburg to Kansai International Airport in Osaka, Yuuri was going about his day prepping for his short program.  There was the early practice at the arena for all the skaters, then lunch.  After lunch Minako managed to grab Yurio for a moment on the way back to the hotel.  She quickly filled him in on Victor’s arrival, let him know they’d already booked a separate room for the night for Victor and Yuuri, and asked if Yurio would mind checking in with Victor throughout the day to see if his flight was on time.

          Yurio had been surprised by the entire thing until Minako mentioned it was Lilia’s idea.  Then he just grinned.  No matter what Yakov said, he almost always acquiesced to Lilia when she had ideas.  The last leg of Victor’s trip would be on the Keihan railway and Minako was planning to pick him up at the Nishisanso station.  It was a pretty good bet that he wouldn’t arrive until after the short programs were finished, and Minako was hoping to bring Victor to the restaurant Minami had suggested.

          Yurio’s job was to keep in contact with Victor while also keeping Yuuri focused and relaxed.  He was a bit sour at the idea of having nothing to do that evening until he realized this would give him time to binge all the FMA Yuuri had brought with him.  After that realization, Yurio was just fine with Victor and Yuuri getting their alone time.

          Ballet went well that afternoon and Yuuri felt as prepared as he could be for the short program without Victor there.  Japan didn’t have the sheer number of figure skaters Russia did, and so their nationals were a bit more condensed.  While Russia took seven days for its nationals, Japan took four, and so the entire thing tended to pass relatively quickly.

          Yuuri kept to himself after the warm up for the short program and Yurio had been in touch with Victor to know he wouldn’t make the short program.  It made the whole thing a bit easier on Minako, who had been wondering how she was going to pick Victor up if she was at the arena.  Yuuri was confident going into his short program and performed well.  He did change the last jump from a quad to a triple simply because he didn’t want to completely outclass the other skaters, but was satisfied with his clean performance.

          Minako sat with Yuuri in the kiss & cry while Lilia and Yurio stood off to the side and checked in with Victor.  Yuuri placed first with a significant lead over Minami at the end of the short program and seemed relaxed.  Yurio had to wipe the smirk off his face before the older skater saw him, but inside could hardly wait to see Yuuri’s reaction when he saw Victor.

          As the Yuris walked off to their room to change into casual clothes, Minako took off for the train station.  Lilia shook her head and smiled at how well this whole endeavor was going.  Mila had taken gold at the Russian nationals and Georgi silver, so their team was performing well. 

          The restaurant Minami had picked was casual and a couple of tables had been pushed together to accommodate their party.  The coaches had their own table, and Yurio kept Yuuri distracted enough he hadn’t noticed the lack of Minako.  Lilia kept mostly silent and just watched the two boys she’d worked with.  It was harder for her to communicate with the other coaches without Minako present, but she’d let them know Minako would be arriving shortly.

          Minami had just launched into a story when he abruptly stopped talking and looked shocked.  He was glancing over Yuuri’s shoulder, as were the other skaters on that side of the table, who also looked very surprised.  As Yuuri made to turn and look behind him a very familiar hand landed on his shoulder.

          “Well I see you’re doing just fine without me, Yuuri.  But we need to talk about why you changed the quad flip at the end of your program,” Victor’s voice said.

          Minako grinned as Yuuri jumped out of his chair and threw himself into Victor’s open arms.  Yurio just shook his head as Minami shrieked and held his hands to his heart.  That kid was so Extra when it came to Yuuri, but then again, all the skaters looked just as happy.  Leaning back in his seat, Yurio grinned up at Yuuri and Victor.  His work was done for now and he had all night to watch as much FMA as he wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I googled the locations of both the Japan and Russian nationals just to see where they were. Then I got the idea to have Victor go to Yuuri because Russia's nationals are that much longer than Japan's. Going with the idea that the men's and women's competitions would take place before the Pairs and ice dancing, I just ran with this whole 'Victor's gonna drop in on Yuuri' thing. And I'm pretty sure I gave myself a cavity writing this chapter, but am very happy with the way it turned out.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the rating has gone up, but only to mature. I had some issues deciding how to handle the rating on this WIP, and finally decided Victor & Yuuri are in an established relationship, so there would be some sex. So umm, I guess let me know if I need to make a place in case people would rather not read the more intimate scenes?

Victor had swiped a chair from the coach’s table so he could sit with the skaters.  Being in the unique position of being both an active skater and a coach could have placed him at either table, but nobody had a crowbar to pry Yuuri and Victor apart, so they just let them be.  Yurio had affected an uncaring appearance once Victor sat down with them, but he occasionally caught Lilia outright grinning at how he unaffected he wasn’t.  The requisite scowl would surface momentarily before he was drawn back into the conversation with the skaters.

          The coaches meanwhile had been catching up on exactly how Victor came to be here in the first place.  Lilia had quietly mentioned noticing how there was just enough time between the Japan and Russian nationals and the men’s and women’s competitions that Victor could fit a small visit in.  Minako grinned at her colleague in ballet.  “You’re much sneakier than I gave you credit for,” Minako said approvingly.

          Once the laughter over that comment had passed the coaches began talking about how to help their respective skaters work on issues they saw in their short programs.  As Lilia offered some advice through Minako’s translation, one of the coaches said something about her skater being sore from a bad fall earlier in the week.

          A strange look passed Minako’s face momentarily before she grabbed her phone and texted someone.  Yurio grabbed his phone as it went off, then threw Minako a somewhat perturbed look.  Still, he texted Victor’s phone number to her as she’d asked.

          After another text on her phone she placed it in her lap to await the reply.  Luckily, Yuuri’s attention was on Minami again as Victor received Minako’s text.

 **Minako:** Victor, this is Minako.  Please tell me you got “supplies” at the airport because Yuuri can’t afford to be sore tomorrow.

          Upon reading the text message, Victor snorted.  He then sent a response and kept an eye to Minako to see her response.

 **Victor:** What kind of fiancé would I be if I were unprepared?  Although, I think you’re discounting the fact that we switch quite often.

          Victor was gratified to see Minako blink at her phone, then blush.  Yurio had been observing the silent back and forth between the two and furiously began texting Minako.

 **Yurio:** Hey!  Quit flirting with Victor!  You’re supposed to be Katsudon’s close friend!

          After receiving this message, Minako groaned and shook her head. 

 **Minako:** Not even close, there, Yurio.  It’s adult stuff.  And now I need a drink.

          Now that Yurio was thoroughly confused he threw a more obvious look Victor’s way.  It was always amazing to him how oblivious Yuuri could be when a silent conversation was occurring about him.  Victor had noticed Yurio’s interaction with Minako and took pity on the teen.

 **Victor:** She wasn’t flirting, Yurio.  She was watching out for Yuuri in her own way.

 **Yurio:** WTF, Victor? 

          Seeing that Yurio wasn’t going to drop this, Victor decided to be blunt.

 **Victor:** She was warning me not to make Yuuri too sore tonight.

          Upon receiving the latest text, Yurio blanched.  He dropped his phone onto the table and covered his face.  This was not what he wanted to read about!

          About this time Yuuri happened to look over and see Yurio with his face covered.  Consolingly, the dark-haired skater placed an arm around the blond’s shoulders.  “Everything okay, Yurio?”

          Uncovering his face, Yurio gave Yuuri a glum look.  “Everything’s great.  I just need to mind my own business.”

          On the other side of Yuuri, Victor laughed into his non-alcoholic drink.  Minako reached over to pat Yurio’s shoulder in sympathy as Yuuri looked even more confused.

          For the remainder of the dinner, Yurio determinedly texted Otabek back and forth and tried to ignore everyone else. 

~*~

          After stopping by Yuuri’s room to gather a change of clothes for the morning, Victor and Yuuri had gone to the room Lilia had reserved for them.  There had been a lovely shower (in which Victor had indulged in his adoration of Yuuri and fellatio) that had relaxed them, which was very helpful since Yuuri was normally a night owl.  Since arriving in Japan this time Yuuri had been coping well enough, but hadn’t been sleeping as well without Victor.  Cuddling up together on the bed and talking quietly was a highlight of their night.

          “I still can’t believe you’re here,” Yuuri said quietly.

          Victor smiled and breathed in the scent of his shampoo on Yuuri’s hair.  “You, my love, have impressed enough of the people in our lives that they decided to utilize my coaching status.  I don’t think the Russian figure skating federation would have been nearly as amenable to me seeing my fiancé.”

          Yuuri lifted his head a bit to meet Victor’s eyes.  “You really didn’t have anything to do with this?”

          Smiling, Victor shook his head.  “As much as I would love to take credit for this, I was just as surprised as you.  Lilia, Yakov, Minako, and Yurio made it happen, somehow.”  Victor watched Yuuri for a moment before placing a small kiss just underneath his neck.  “I’ve been telling you how important you are to all of us, Yuuri.  One of these days you’ll believe me.”

          Yuuri tilted his head back for more kisses and sighed.  “I know how you feel about me, Victor.  But it’s hard for me to believe that so many other people would do this for us.”

          “Mmmm.  Clearly, I need to work on building your confidence,” Victor murmured as he made his slow way up to Yuuri’s mouth.

          “I think maybe I just need to accept what I can’t understand,” Yuuri said softly before returning Victor’s kiss. 

          Victor smiled against his mouth.  “Yes, I think maybe you do,” he agreed.  “Now, we need sleep.  But we will be continuing this in the morning, my love.”

          Yuuri rolled over so Victor was spooning him from behind.  “That **is** my favorite way to wake up,” he mumbled with a yawn.

          Victor laughed softly into his neck and pulled him further into his embrace.  Slowly they both fell into a deep sleep, wrapped contentedly around each other.

~*~

          Victor always woke up before Yuuri, and this morning proved no different.  What was somewhat different was Victor staying in bed and simply breathing Yuuri in, rather than getting up and doing something.  Victor had known this separation would be hard on him, but he hadn’t realized how much it would physically hurt to not have Yuuri in his arms at night.  His heart had ached each night he’d had to sleep without his love.  Practices had been annoyingly necessary, and although he’d made no mistakes in his short program at Nationals, Yakov had known his heart wasn’t in it. 

          To motivate him before his free skate Yakov had tried something new.  Catching Victor waiting for one of the endless text replies from Yuuri, Yakov had stated, “You came back to the ice for him, da?  Then show him, Vitya.  Skate for Yuuri and show him how much he means to you.  There’s no chance he’d miss your free skate.”  As caught up in each other as Victor and Yuuri were, Yakov had found that using their connection was much more productive than continuing to be annoyed by it.

          And Victor had found his free skate much easier than his short program since Yakov had him focus on his Yuuri.  All his feelings poured onto the ice in a way they’d only done one before – when he and Yuuri had made history with a pairs skate.  Victor smiled at the thought that Yurio had been so infuriated at first to ‘see’ the real Victor on the ice.  The smile faded at the thought that Yurio (who would never admit this) had also skated his love for Yuuri and won a gold medal.  The gold medal that had kept Yuuri from retiring, in fact.  Yurio had shortly after the podium ceremony walked past Victor and bit out “You’re welcome.”  So, Victor knew, even if it was never mentioned aloud, that Yurio had been appalled by the idea if Yuuri retiring, as well.

          Yuuri sighed in his sleep and snuggled closer to Victor’s chest.  With a happy sigh of his own, Victor contemplated how the two of them had gotten together in the first place.  It had been such a mess in the beginning, with Victor not realizing Yuuri had no memory of the banquet.  All the flirting he’d tried had been run from (literally at least once) and he’d almost given up on the whole thing.  Then Yurio had shown up and demanded Victor choreograph a program for him, and Yuuri hadn’t wanted Victor to leave.  In fact, if Yurio hadn’t unintentionally pushed them closer together, Victor and Yuuri may not have ever found this connection.  Victor suspected Yurio had more admiration for the Japanese skater than he would ever admit, but honestly didn’t know if he was unhappy that they’d become a couple.  It was something he was willing to keep quiet about as Yurio seemed happy enough with their current situation.

          Letting his hand fall just a bit further down Yuuri’s back, Victor thought back to their first few sexual encounters.  Yuuri had been so new to it all, but so curious and Victor had wanted to do any and everything that Yuuri was willing to try.  They’d been so very gentle with each other in the beginning.  Victor went so much more slowly than he had with any other relationship because he treasured Yuuri.  And Yuuri was bashful in the beginning, but gained confidence the more he touched Victor and saw how Victor **loved** having Yuuri’s hands, mouth, and tongue on him.

          The hotel room in Barcelona had been a literal sexual awakening for them.  It had been the first time they’d been alone since becoming a couple.  In Hasetsu they couldn’t really relax completely for fear that Yuuri’s family might hear something.  They’d had lots of interesting sex while in Hasetsu, but Barcelona had given them the chance to let loose in a way they’d not had before.  It had been liberating and only cemented their wish to move into their own place.

          Victor turned his head into his pillow to chuckle softly at the idea of Minako warning him to be careful of his Yuuri.  As if he’d not thought of that on the long flight to Japan and stopped in a shop at the airport for condoms and lubrication.  Since Yuuri was skating tonight and Victor wouldn’t be skating again until his exhibition on the 26th, Victor also knew he’d have to persuade Yuuri to wait until they were both back in Russia to have Victor inside him.  Victor loved that they took turns, but didn’t want their lovemaking interfering with their skating performances.  Yuuri would no doubt protest, but Victor was confident in his ability to distract his fiancé.

          Yuuri mumbled something into Victor’s neck, then drew in a deep breath.  “You’re still here,” he whispered before blinking up into Victor’s eyes. 

          “Where else would I be?  We have all morning and some of the afternoon before your practice and free skate, my love.  What would you like to do with all that time?”

          Yuuri smiled softly.  “I have a few ideas.  Most of them involve us staying in this bed until we go eat something.  Do you have a problem with that, Vitya?”

          Victor opened his mouth to reply, but found his ability to speak lost when Yuuri leaned forward and began kissing his way up Victor’s neck.  At the moan he earned, Yuuri smiled.  “I’ll take that as a no,” he murmured before pulling Victor’s lips down to meet his own.

          Yuuri had discovered early in their sexual relationship that Victor adored having his neck and that spot just behind his ear kissed.  He hadn’t known what to expect with Victor because it was **Victor** who’d been with who knew how many other lovers.  And because it was Victor, who adored Yuuri more than may have been wise, Yuuri had never felt inadequate even though he lacked experience.  Victor had encouraged him to explore and not be afraid to explore his more dominant side. 

          They discovered they both loved sex of any type with the other.  While Victor had preferred topping before his relationship with Yuuri, they both loved bottoming as well.  Yuuri licked Victor’s nipple into his mouth while allowing his right hand to drift downward.  The sounds Victor made when Yuuri loved on him were enough to pull a moan from him, but Yuuri was an expert at focusing on one thing at a time.  His current focus was on lowering his body to pull Victor into his mouth, and his reward was hearing Victor’s whine as well as feeling his hips spasm on the bed.

          They were both pretty wound up since they’d been separated for several days.  As a result, Victor didn’t even get the chance to warn Yuuri before he was orgasming.  Pulling off and moving upward, Yuuri smiled softly before kissing his fiancé.  “Feel better?”

          “Oh, my God, Yuuri.  I don’t know if I can do this for months.  I don’t like being apart from you,” Victor confessed.  He pulled Yuuri’s head to his chest while his breathing settled.  “I know you want to compete against me and you helped me find inspiration on the ice again, but…”

          Yuuri listened to Victor’s heart beating beneath his head.  “You don’t want me to retire, either.  This is hard, I know it is, but I think if we don’t at least try it we’re going to regret it.”  Yuuri let Victor play with his hair a bit more before moving to look down at him again.  “You know how much I love you, right?”

          Victor always got a bit teary when Yuuri said the L word to him.  Nodding, Victor said, “Yes.  I do.  We’ll try it for this year, Yuuri.  But I don’t think I can do this for much longer than that.”

          Yuuri began kissing up Victor’s chest.  “A one year trial, hmmm?  I guess it’s the best I can hope for right now.”  He paused and lifted himself to put one hand up to cup Victor’s cheek and meet his eyes.  “Now, Vitya.  What would you like?”

          Silently, Victor pulled Yuuri’s hand from his face and kissed the palm.  Then, holding Yuuri’s gaze Victor pulled two of Yuuri’s fingers into his mouth and sucked on them meaningfully.  Once he had them nice and wet, Victor moved Yuuri’s unresisting hand down his own body.  Pulling his left leg up against his chest, Victor meaningfully placed Yuuri’s hand at his entrance.

          Closing his eyes, Yuuri swallowed.  “As if I could say no to that,” he whispered.

          Much later, when Victor was feeling cherished and they were both a satisfied, sweaty mess, Yuuri mumbled against Victor’s chest.  “We’d better go eat something or all I’ll do tonight is fall on the ice.”

~*~

          After they’d emerged from their room to eat brunch, Victor and Yuuri dropped by Minako and Lilia’s room.  Victor wasn’t surprised to find Yurio there as it was close to the time Lilia had wanted them to practice ballet.  Yurio raised eyebrows at them when Yuuri suggested they go ahead and head to the room they’d been practicing in, and Minako flat out laughed.    
          “Nyet,” was Lilia’s answer.  “You and Victor are going to enjoy this time we put together for you.  Just remember when the public practice is so you’re not late.”  She tossed a small packet of Epsom salts at Victor as Yuuri gaped at her.  “For the bath,” she said with a direct look.

          “But,” Yuuri tried one last time just before Yurio blew out his breath in irritation. 

          “Go, Katsudon!  We’ll meet you at the rink in two and a half hours.  Don’t be late!”  Yurio pushed them out the door and closed it in their faces.

          Seriously, Lilia and Yakov had put this whole thing together and Yuuri wanted to practice ballet?  There were times Yurio just didn’t get Yuuri’s drive for practice – if Lilia and Yakov had done something like this for him he’d be eating it up! 

          Glancing over a Minako and Lilia, Yurio made a face.  “What should we do?  I don’t want to just sit here,” he said.

          Minako grabbed her bag and grinned at them.  “We’re going shopping!  Have either of you been shopping in Japan?”

          Lilia shook her head no and Yurio said, “I got a sweatshirt once…”

          “Leave it to me!  You two are going to love this,” Minako declared.

          When Minako’s back was turned Lilia and Yurio gave each other doubtful looks.  Minako was a shopping fiend whereas neither of them preferred to be in public for any length of time.  Yurio finally shrugged and Lilia sighed in agreement.  It was only two hours; how bad could it be?

~*~

          Back in their room, Yuuri turned and locked their door.  He turned to lean against the door and contemplate his fiancé while Victor walked further into the room.  While this morning had been fun, Yuuri had noticed the distinct lack of their usual amount of switching during their lovemaking.  His brow furrowed as he realized Victor was probably trying to make sure Yuuri’s performance tonight wouldn’t be affected by any of their activities. 

          With a small grin, Yuuri remembered Lilia throwing a packet of bath salts at Victor.  Baths with Epsom salts were remarkable for taking aches and pains away.  And they had plenty of time to relax in the bath after what he had planned.  And really, getting Victor to agree wouldn’t be too difficult.  Yuuri always got what he wanted if he was willing to ask Victor for it.  At this point in their relationship Yuuri was confident enough to talk with Victor about things that used to make him stammer and blush.  And Victor **loved** when Yuuri asked for certain things during sex.

          Walking up behind Victor, Yuuri slid his hands on his fiancés hips.  “Vitya,” he murmured into the back of Victor’s neck.

          Victor trembled slightly before turning to pull Yuuri into his arms.  “Yes, my love?”  The words were whispered into Yuuri’s hairline as this was one of Victor’s favorite spots to place light kisses.

          Yuuri enjoyed the attention Victor was giving him for a bit.  Thinking of how he wanted to word this, he eventually murmured, “Mmmm I’d like you to stop being so careful of me.  You’re not going to hurt me and it’s going to be another four days before we get back to Russia together.  Will you just trust me that I’ll tell you if we need to stop doing something?”

          Victor sucked in a breath and considered Yuuri.  “Didn’t you enjoy this morning?”

          Yuuri ran his thumb over Victor’s bottom lip before gazing up at him through his eyelashes.  “Of course, I did.  But this morning was about comforting you.  I want to feel you, Victor.  All of you.  And we won’t go crazy like we did in Barcelona, but…please?”

          Victor swallowed.  He gazed up at the ceiling and laughed shakily.  “I never would have thought agreeing to coach you this year would lead to conversations like these.  You want me inside you that badly, Yuuri?”

          At his word choice, Yuuri’s pupils dilated.  “Yes,” he said simply. 

          Victor closed his eyes briefly and muttered a curse in Russian.  “You know we can’t do this at a competition we’re both in,” he began somewhat sternly.

          A small smile played on Yuuri’s lips as he reached up to pull his sweater off.  “Mmmhmm,” he murmured as he made sure he had Victor’s eyes on him as he reached down to finger the hem of his shirt.

          “Oh, my God, I can’t think when you strip in front of me,” Victor gasped as he tried to remember what he’d been saying.

          Solemnly, Yuuri nodded.  “I know.  It’s been useful several times when you’re trying to take your coaching role too seriously.”  Deliberately he pulled his shirt off and sauntered over to the bed.  Sitting down and indulging in a good stretch, he tilted his head to look at Victor.  “You want to come and sit with me?”

          Victor’s good intentions evaporated as he threw his coat off.  Pouncing on Yuuri he immediately sucked his fiancés right nipple into his mouth.  “Oh, you are going to get it,” he murmured.

          Yuuri’s gasp was everything he wanted to hear before their lips met and clothes became nothing but a barrier.  Much later they found out that Lilia’s Epsom salts were indeed great for figure skaters who had practice soon.

 

 

As much as I love AO3, it's rather annoying that you can't message people.  So I made a [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/wintersblight) for any asks or messages.  It's pretty much just for YOI stuff, but I'll post updates on fanfics there, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have no idea how long this is going to end up? I'll update the chapters on AO3 as I get some idea.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit shorter than the previous chapters, but it's going to segue into some pretty serious stuff next chapter. I wanted to cheer myself up, so I finished this chapter up and hope everyone enjoys it. Also, I don't have an Instagram account so please don't yell at me if I got how the messaging in Instagram works wrong.

At the public practice that afternoon Victor took a picture of Yuuri on the ice and uploaded it to his Instagram.  Shortly after this he received a comment from Phichit, whose love of SNS was legendary.

 **phichit+chu** Are you at his practice?  How did that happen, I thought you were in Russia?

 **v-nikiforov** Yakov arranged for me to fulfill my coaching duties, wasn’t that great of him?  I’ll be here to see Yuuri’s free skate, but I’m leaving for Russia early tomorrow morning.

          Victor glanced up to keep an eye on Yuuri, who was looking very good out on the ice today, before glancing back down at another notification.  With a bit of surprise, Victor saw that Phichit had messaged him.

 **phichit+chu d** Hey Victor, you and I should Facetime some time.  I need to ask you some things when Yuuri isn’t around.  And I need to tell you about something JJ sent me after he and I talked.

          Victor pulled his attention away from his phone to again watch Yuuri.  While he felt good about his performances at the Russian nationals, Victor was serious about only wanting to compete for another year.  He’d made a commitment to be Yuuri’s coach, and while they were making it work with both of them competing, he didn’t intend to do this long term.  He wanted to commit his full time and resources to coaching Yuuri and was continuing to feel frustrated that he couldn’t.  Although Yuuri was holding up surprisingly well on this trip, Victor knew it had to do more with the presence of Minako and Yurio, of all people, than it had to do with him.  Well.  He couldn’t say that now since he was here, but before he’d arrived Yuuri had been doing well.

          As Yuuri skated over to get a drink of water, Victor smiled.  “You look wonderful out there,” he said sincerely.

          Yuuri grinned at him.  “I still can’t believe how great your free skate went.  It was amazing, Victor!  You’re going to keep me in top form for the rest of this season,” he added before turning back to the ice.

          Victor sighed.  Yuuri wasn’t going to make it easy on him to retire after the World Championships.  He’d already promised the remainder of this season, but Victor couldn’t imagine a reason he’d carry on after this Worlds.  Yuuri, however, had promised him five World Championships, and he intended to hold him to it.  There was the possibility Yuuri may want Victor to stay on for the 2018 Winter Olympics, but Victor had no interest in competing in another Olympics.

          Glancing back down at his phone, Victor worried his lip before replying.

 **v-nikiforov d** Not that I mind Facetiming with you, but what do you need to talk to me about without Yuuri there?

 **phichit_chu d** I know you’ve dealt with Yuuri’s anxiety, but have you ever seen him have a panic attack?

          Victor frowned down at his phone.  He wasn’t sure what a panic attack was, but he’d become very familiar with Yuuri’s anxiety over the months.

          After another quick glance out at the ice, Victor sent a quick reply to Phichit.

 **v-nikiforov d** I’m not sure what a panic attack is?

          Victor set his phone down as Yurio came up to stand next to him.  Yurio and Lilia had seemed somewhat relieved upon entering the practice area without Minako.  Apparently shopping with Minako was rather like surviving a hurricane.  Yurio looked quite satisfied with what he was seeing out on the ice and Victor allowed himself to feel pleased at what the three of them had accomplished.

          “He looks good out there,” Yurio said quietly.

          “Yes, he does.  It’s hard to believe he can be so hard on himself when he skates like this,” Victor said.

          Yurio sent Victor a sour look.  “I looked up some stuff on anxiety on the web.  Have you bothered to do that?”

          Victor sucked his bottom lip into his mouth.  Phichit may have a point if Yurio had looked at some of Yuuri’s problems more than Victor had.  “Phichit wants to Facetime with me about that.  He asked that it be sometime when Yuuri wasn’t around.”

          Yurio made a small hmming noise.  “You know, I’m pretty sure you’re going to have some down time between when you get back to Russia and when you have to do your exhibition.  That might be a good time for a talk with him.”

          Victor nodded to himself.  “I think you’re right.  Have you been having a good time with my Yuuri?”

          Yurio’s ear tips turned red as he glared at Victor.  “Katsudon isn’t your property, Victor.  Da, it’s been fun.  But don’t tell him I said that!”

          Victor blew a kiss at Yuuri, who had been glancing over at them, before turning to fully face Yurio.  “I would never claim Yuuri as my property.  He is the love of my life and I most certainly belong to him, but no.  That’s not what we are to each other.  As you very well know,” he added with a significant look at Yurio.

          Yurio’s face flamed momentarily.  “I’m going to go sit with Lilia,” he ground out before stalking away.

          Victor glanced back at his phone.  Phichit had messaged him again and included a link this time.  Victor opened it and skimmed an article on WebMD on panic attacks.  Raising his eyebrows, Victor worried his lip again.  According to this, Yuuri’s anxiety at the Cup of China wasn’t the worst of it.

          Setting his phone down for a moment, Victor gazed out at Yuuri.  It was so hard to believe looking at Yuuri in his top form that he was the same person Victor had failed so badly at calming down all those months ago.  But Phichit had lived with Yuuri for years, and if he was offering advice it would be wise to take it.

          Picking up his phone again, Victor messaged Phichit.

 **v-nikiforov d** No, I don’t think I’ve been around Yuuri when he’s having a panic attack.  I should have time to Facetime with you when I get back to Russia, if that will work on your end?

 **phichit+chu d** I think it will.  Don’t get me wrong, you and Yuuri work so well together, but I think talking to you about some of the things Ciao Ciao and I had to come up with when he was having a panic attack might do you some good.  It can be pretty scary when it’s happening.

 **v-nikiforov d** That sounds like a great idea.  TTYS, I need to focus on Yuuri now.

          Victor set his phone down for good as Yuuri came skating up to him.  It was the final fifteen minutes of the public practice and Victor and Yuuri were trying to compromise on his jumps.  Yuuri wanted to lower them to not outclass the other skaters, and Victor wanted to see Yuuri at his full potential.  In the end, they decided to move the quad flip into the middle of his program instead of at the end, and move all other quads to the front of his program as the other skaters would be doing.  Yuuri would do triples in the second half of his program, and as well as he was skating today would probably win the gold by a large margin.

          As practice wrapped up, Yurio walked over to Victor again.  “Hey, do you and Katsudon want to come get some food with us?”

          “Hmmm. Yes, if it’s something light.  We’ll go out after the competition tonight and find Yuuri some katsudon to celebrate.”

          Yurio side-eyed Victor.  “It won’t be as good as his mother’s, you know that, right?”

          Victor sent a small smile to Yurio.  “Yes, but it’s the principle of the thing.  We both know Yuuri is getting that gold medal tonight.  He needs to celebrate and his favorite food for that is katsudon.”

          Yurio blew out an irritated breath.  “Yeah, I’ll talk to Minako.  See where she says to go.  What are you two going to do before the competition?”  There was genuine curiosity in Yurio’s voice, which had Victor beaming.

          “Why, I thought we’d hang out with you!  You can show me this show you’ve been watching together.  It must be good for both of you to like it so much!”

          Yurio blinked at Victor as Yuuri skated up.  “Eh?  Do you even know what anime is, Victor?”

          Yuuri caught the tail end of that conversation and narrowed his eyes.  He watched as Victor shook his head and smiled.  “No clue!”

          Yurio turned disgusted eyes to Yuuri.  “I brought some Studio Ghibli.  You know we can’t start him on FMA.  The whole Nina and Alexander thing would have him in tears.”

          Yuuri nodded in agreement.  “Not to mention Trisha.  Starting with FMA would be a bad idea, Victor.  What Ghibli did you bring?” he asked Yurio as Victor handed him his skate guards.

          Yurio frowned as he thought it over.  “Howl’s Moving Castle, The Cat Returns, Princess Mononoke, and Spirited Away.  I think maybe The Cat Returns?”  He tilted his head at Yuuri to see what he thought as Victor began to frown at the two of them.

          Yuuri was still thinking it over as Victor burst in with, “But you’ve both seen the other thing and you’re much younger than me!”

          Yurio shot Victor a disbelieving look as Yuuri murmured soothingly, “Of course, Vitya, but there’s a lot of tragic things that happen at the beginning of FMA and you just feel things like that so much.  You kind of have to ease into Fullmetal Alchemist if you’ve never seen anime before.”

          Victor looked confused.  “If it’s so tragic then why do you like it so much?”

          Yuuri looked to Yurio for this explanation as he made to go change into his sneakers.  Yurio thought for a moment before saying “We like it because it shows you just what you can accomplish if you are determined enough and have the right friends to help you get through it.”

          Yuuri beamed at Yurio’s explanation, while Victor gave a shrug.  “Okay, we can watch the cat movie if that’s what you both want.”

          Having finished with his sneakers, Yuuri placed his skates in his backpack before turning to hug Victor.  “I think you’ll really like The Cat Returns,” he said into the hollow of Victor’s neck.

          Yurio glared at the two of them cuddling before turning to call over his shoulder.  “I’ll text you where we’re going to eat, idiots!”

~*~

          As predicted, Victor had loved The Cat Returns and Yuuri had won the Japan Nationals handily.  All of the skaters and coaches had gone out to celebrate after the podium ceremony, and as Yurio had predicted, the restaurant’s katsudon wasn’t as good as Hiroko’s.  But Yuuri was having a wonderful time hanging out with other skaters, and the coaches were finally loosening up while sharing some sake. 

Victor sat next to Yuuri with a somewhat sad little smile which Yurio observed without surprise.  Thankfully Victor wasn’t as inconsolable as he’d been at the airport, but Yuuri had already told Yurio he’d be accompanying Victor on the train to Kansai International Airport.  So, he hadn’t really started moping yet.  In fact, Yurio had already decided the two of them would be better off in the room with him so Victor **didn’t** become inconsolable.  They were probably only going to cuddle tonight anyway, so he didn’t feel bad about telling Victor they should stay with him.

When Yurio mentioned his idea to Yuuri, the other worried his lip a bit before answering, “We may still end up going to the other room, but I think watching another movie is a good idea.”

Victor snaked his arm around Yuuri.  “I’ll go wherever you’ll be, darling,” he murmured into Yuuri’s ear.  Yuuri predictably blushed while Yurio sneered.  He did take a picture of the two of them and post it on his Instagram, mainly to get Phichit’s attention.  It was really too easy to get Yuuri’s best friend’s attention, but then again, Yurio couldn’t say much since he and Otabek had hit it off.

 **yuri-plisetsky d** If you need any help getting the anxiety thing into Victor’s thick head let me know.

 **phichit+chu d** I’ll do that.  Thanks for the heads up!

Making sure neither Victor nor Yuuri had imbibed in any alcohol (seriously, no one wanted another Chihoko incident), Yurio walked back to the hotel room with them.  They were trying to decide between Spirited Away and Howl’s Moving Castle as Yurio stopped at the snack machine to grab some things to munch on.

“I don’t know, they’re both really good,” Yuuri was saying as Victor hung on him.  “Do you have a preference, Yurio?”

Yurio jammed money into the vending machine and made a face.  “Maybe Howl’s Moving Castle first?  Cuz with Chihiro’s parents and all that might bother Victor.”

Victor pouted at that.  “The two of you make me sound like a child.”

Yurio facepalmed while Yuuri sighed.  “No Vitya, it’s just that we both know how much things affect you.  We both really like sharing anime with you, but the thing about anime is that it’s gorgeous and then it kicks you in the teeth.”

Yurio finally had all the snacks he wanted.  Stuffing some of them into his hoodie pockets and handing the rest to Yuuri, Yurio started walking to their room.  “Studio Ghibli is really the best thing to start you on, Victor.  Yes, some of them will break your heart, but the overall story makes up for it.”

“What’s so good about this Howl’s Castle, then?” Victor asked.  The two of them looked like a two-headed entity as they followed Yurio down the hallway.  Yurio shook his head at them before turning to open the room door.

          “Howl’s Moving Castle is about making your own family.  It’s about loving people wholly, with all their good and bad points,” Yuuri murmured as he pulled Victor into the room with him.

          “It also helps that the magic kicks ass,” Yurio grinned over his shoulder at Yuuri.  “Okay, let’s get this set up.  What time does your train leave in the morning?”

          Victor moaned as Yuuri smiled fondly down at him.  “We have to be at the station at 6:30.”  It was already 9 pm and Yurio knew neither of them would be getting much sleep, but the sooner they started the movie the sooner they could go to their own room.

          “Okay, Katsudon.  I’ll have some food for you here when you get back from taking Victor, then you’ll probably want a nap so I can go hang out with Lilia.  Victor, you make sure and tell us when you get back to Russia, okay?  He’ll worry if you don’t,” Yurio added with a head jerk towards Yuuri.

          Victor shot a knowing grin at Yurio.  The three of them had settled onto one bed to better share the snacks and Yurio was heading back from hooking up the laptop to the TV with an HDMI cable.  “It’s so **nice** of you to watch out for my Yuuri.  I knew you cared, Yurio!”

          The tips of Yurio’s ears pinked up while he glared at Victor.  Yuuri huffed a bit and bopped Victor on the nose.  “Victor, behave yourself.  You ready?” he asked as Yurio sat down next to him.

          “Da,” came the reply.  Yurio waited until the movie had started and Yuuri was watching it before leaning back and pointedly looking at Victor.  The older skater noticed and glanced curiously over at Yurio just in time to see Yurio nod his head toward Yuuri and give a thumbs up.  Victor grinned back at him, then settled in to watch the movie.

 

If anyone is interested, here's the article I looked at from WebMD on [panic attacks](http://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/guide/mental-health-panic-disorder#1).

 

Also, here's a link to [the Russian LGBT network](https://www.lgbtnet.org/en/endonate) if anyone wants to donate and help out the folks in Chechnya.  We've got a massive fanbase with YOI, I think we could do a lot of good if we really wanted to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if it will be in the next chapter yet, but there will be a panic attack upcoming. It's going to be intense and I'll mark it and leave a warning so people can skip it so as not to get triggered. I think this thing is going to be nine chapters, but it may grow beyond that. Also, how great was that drama from Yuri on Stage with both Victor and Yuuri getting spectacularly drunk together? None of us will ever be able to write Victuuri as Extra as canon Victuuri is!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter ran long...longer than any other chapter so far. Hope you guys enjoy that! Also, just wanted to mention that Phichit does talk about a panic attack Yuuri had back in Detroit in this chapter, so please skip that bit if you need to. It happens during Phichit's Facetime with Victor, which is at the end of the chapter.

          The two Yuris had sat back and watched as Victor had talked animatedly about Howl’s Moving Castle for half an hour.  Yuuri had watched indulgently as Yurio just grinned fit for the Cheshire cat while Victor had gone on and on about how caring Sophie was, how oblivious yet wise Howl was, and Calcifer’s spectacular sarcasm.  At some point Yurio had turned to Yuuri and said, “This is going to be so much fun, Katsudon!”

          Yuuri nodded and shoulder bumped Yurio before sitting up and stretching his arms over his head.  “It’s going to be awesome!  But now I have to take him back to our room so we can get ready for the trip.  Thanks for the food offer in the morning, Yurio.  I’ll take you up on that and the nap.”

          Yurio snorted.  “Yeah sleep isn’t going to be your friend tonight.  I’ll see you tomorrow, Katsudon.”  Yurio lay back on the bed and watched as Yuuri began to steer Victor toward the door.  “Hey, Victor!  Make sure you thank Lilia if you haven’t already.  She didn’t have to do all this for you.”

          Victor stopped moving toward the door and turned to face Yurio.  There was a certain look in his eye that had Yurio tensing before Victor deftly stepped around Yuuri and pounced on the bed.  Yurio was only able to get a startled shriek out before Victor was hugging him.  “I will.  Thank you, Yuri.  This meant a lot to both of us,” Victor said quietly before quickly getting up to walk back over to the door.

          Yuuri shook his head and laughed.  Yurio shot him a mortified look before muttering, “Well, go on then.” 

          Slowly, Yuuri walked over to the indignant blond and gave him a hug.  “Thank you for making this trip so good for all of us,” he said softly.  Yuuri held the hug long enough for Yurio to return it before standing and making his way over to Victor.  After waving good-bye one last time, they closed the door behind themselves on the way out.

          Yurio flung himself backwards on the bed and covered his flaming face with his hands.  At this point he was just grateful Victor was the only one who knew about his feelings for Yuuri.  Well, Victor and Otabek.  But Beka would never make a big deal out of it, and Yurio had only mentioned it once.  So yeah.  That was embarrassing.  But he’d never pass up the chance to spend more time helping Yuuri and it also let him keep an eye on Victor.  Because as much as he knew Victor loved Yuuri, he also knew Victor Nikiforov could be an absolute ass.  And he was determined that Victor wasn’t going to fuck this up.

          After taking a few deep breaths, Yurio sat up and looked around.  Well.  Now that he knew they’d be watching more anime with Victor he might as well start making a list as to which ones would be good.  Grabbing a pen and his notebook, Yurio walked over to his laptop and started a Disturbed playlist.  As he wrote down the names of some possible anime movies and series, he made pro and con notes for each.  Victor Nikiforov was a piece of work, alright.  It always required research to introduce the man to anything new.

~*~

          Once they’d reached their room, Yuuri had double locked the door and begun the process of gathering all of Victor’s things.  It was always amazing to him how Victor could spread his things all over a hotel room, but take forever to repack and then almost inevitably forget something.  When Yuuri was about half-way done refolding Victor’s clothes, Victor came up behind him and wrapped his arms around Yuuri’s waist.

          “You don’t have to do that, Yuuri,” Victor said quietly from where he had rested his head against Yuuri’s shoulder.

          “I know I don’t,” Yuuri agreed.  “But if I do this now it gives us more time to spend together and I don’t have to worry about doing it in the morning.”  He turned his head to place a quick kiss on the top of Victor’s head.  “Now, what do you need to leave out for the morning?”

          Victor sighed.  “Just leave the suit out.  It’s comfortable enough to travel in and then we won’t have to get it to fit in the suitcase again.  I’d like to leave you my sleep things,” he murmured into the side of Yuuri’s neck.

          Yuuri gasped quietly against Victor’s lips.  “You…brought pajamas?” he asked in confusion.  Victor usually slept naked so Yuuri didn’t understand why they were discussing pajamas.

          “Hmmm.  You can wear my pajamas tomorrow and think of me when I’m back in Russia,” Victor muttered as he stood up and pulled Yuuri into his arms for his kiss.

          Yuuri’s practical train of thought derailed as Victor’s clever fingers made their way down his back to grip his ass.  Even though Yuuri had asked Victor to be less careful of him that morning Victor had only used his fingers inside him while sucking Yuuri off.  Victor was very protective of Yuuri when it came to his skating, and Yuuri still had his exhibition skate tomorrow.  Victor, however, had another full day before he had to skate his exhibition, and he fully intended to make the most of it. 

          Yuuri whined when Victor sucked on his earlobe before gasping, “Victor you’re going to be traveling all day tomorrow!  You’re going to be sore if we keep this up.”  There was no question where this was leading to if Yuuri didn’t put a stop to it soon, because when Victor was this worked up there wouldn’t be any holding back from either of them.

          “I want to feel you tomorrow,” Victor practically growled into his neck.  “You know how much I hate being separated from you.  The rest of the skating season, Yuuri.  I’m willing to do this for that long, but then I’m retiring.  I don’t give a fuck about the Olympics, that’s for you to win.  I’ve given so much of my life to the ice, but I’m giving it to us now.”  Victor pulled back just long enough to tug at Yuuri’s shirt.  “Take it off, Yuuri.”

          Gasping, Yuuri pulled the shirt over his head before blindly grabbing at Victor again.  “Now’s not the best time to talk about this, Vitya.”  He scrabbled backwards onto the bed and began hurriedly pulling of his clothing as Victor made short work of his own.  Prowling towards the bed, Victor reminded Yuuri of a snow leopard stalking its prey.  Swallowing hard, Yuuri ran his fingers up into Victor’s hair as the bigger man closed his eyes and pushed his nose up close to Yuuri’s hairline. 

          Victor breathed in Yuuri’s scent for a few moments while Yuuri pulled him close.  “Victor,” he said quietly.  “You know I’m not going anywhere, right?  I mean, you know I’m just as much yours as you’re mine, right?”

          Victor took one last deep breath before pulling back to meet his eyes.  “Da.  It’s just…I was alone for so long.  And sometimes I get scared that it’s too good.”

          Yuuri placed a small kiss on Victor’s forehead.  “You’re waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

          Victor pulled a breath in, then out before nodding.  “Yes.  I think I’ll feel better once we’re all back in St. Petersburg.”  They were both quiet for a few moments reveling in being this close to each other.  Some of the tension had bled out of Victor’s body so the next time he kissed Yuuri it was slow and sweet.

          Yuuri moaned into Victor’s mouth.  “So, we’re not sleeping tonight?”

          “Mmmm, I think not,” Victor murmured.  “I expect to be marked well tonight, Yuuri.  I want to see you on me tomorrow,” he mumbled into Yuuri’s throat as he made his slow way down Yuuri’s body.

          Later, when they were resting in the bathtub with some bubble bath Victor had brought, Yuuri tilted his head back against Victor and asked languidly, “Well?  Will you be happy tomorrow?”

          Smiling, Victor nodded.  “Yes, love.  It doesn’t matter where I look in the mirror, I’ll see you everywhere.  Although you were very careful of my neck, Yuuri.”

          Yuuri nodded with his eyes closed.  “Yakov’s face goes funny colors when your neck’s marked up.”  Sighing, Yuuri thought about what Victor had said earlier.  “You really don’t want to try for another Olympics, Victor?”

          Victor ran a soothing hand up Yuuri’s side.  “I’ve had my fill of the Olympics.  What I really want is to be able to fully support you and the rest of the Russian team for PyeongChang.  Besides, if I’m retired I can travel with you wherever you go, and that’s pretty much my favorite thing.”

          “Alright, but you get to tell Yurio,” Yuuri mumbled before turning his head to meet Victor’s kiss.

~*~

          Yurio was as good as his word and had food waiting for Yuuri when he dragged himself into the hotel room later the next morning.  Yuuri had a small containing Victor’s pajamas (which might as well be Yuuri’s since Victor never wore them) and his phone as he practically fell on the bed. 

          Yurio snorted at him from the other bed.  “I take it things went well last night?”

          Yuuri turned his head just enough so Yurio could hear him before mumbling, “Relationships are great, but they’re a lot of work.  Take your time because if you and Otabek decide to start dating things are going to be very different.”

          Yurio gaped at Yuuri before abruptly shutting his mouth.  Without really thinking about it, Yurio muttered, “How did you know Victor was it for you, anyway?”

          As soon as the words left his mouth Yurio turned away to hide his flaming face.  He couldn’t believe he’d just said that, but the deed was done.  Thankfully, he’d asked Yuuri, not Victor or there would be no living this down.

          Yuuri slowly sat up and propped the pillows up to lean against while he thought about what Yurio had said.  Leaning his head back against the headboard tiredly, Yuuri said “After you left Hasetsu, I asked Yuuko how she knew it was the real thing when it came to her and Takeshi.  Things…changed between me and Victor after you left and I wasn’t sure what to make of it.  So, I asked Yuuko, and she told me that there’s not really a good answer to that.  She said it takes time and trust, and a whole lot of work.  And really…Victor and I kind of stumbled together I think.  It’s crazy to think of how it all worked out, but I can’t imagine life without him in it anymore”

          Yuuri turned his head slightly to meet Yurio’s open look.  “You’ve got lots of time to work things out with Otabek, Yuri.  Don’t put extra pressure on yourself when you don’t have to.  Sometimes things just work out in ways you’d never expect.  How else do you think I ended up with Victor?”

          Yuuri sent Yurio a tired smile.  “Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to eat and take that nap.  Will you wake me up around 3 pm?  If I sleep later than that I won’t be able to sleep tonight.”

          Yurio nodded and gathered what he needed for Lilia and Minako’s room.  Just before he left, he turned his head so Yuuri could hear him better.  “Thanks, Yuuri.  I’m glad you and Victor got together…you two are good together.”

          As he walked down the hallway to the elevator, Yurio thought about what Yuuri’d said.  Talking to Beka was easy, and he hadn’t let himself think about anything else.  But, now that Yuuri’d brought it up, Yurio couldn’t help but be curious.  Did Yuuri really think he and Otabek would be good together?

~*~

          Victor had managed to sleep through most of his flight back to Koltsova Airport in Yekaterinburg, but was still a yawning thing when Yakov picked him up at the baggage claim.  After texting Yuuri to let him know he’d arrived safely in Russia, Victor stared tiredly at the rotating baggage claim.  Side-eyeing him, Yakov asked how the trip had gone.

          Victor managed a smile before pushing his hands tiredly through his hair.  “It was amazing, thank you so much for arranging it for us, Yakov!”  Stretching his arms above his head and feeling the corresponding movement through his well-loved body had Victor sighing in satisfaction.  “Now, where can I find some coffee?  I need to Facetime with Phichit before we do anything at the arena today.”

          Victor and Yakov made their way back to the hotel where Victor got coffee from a nearby café.  Before heading off to his hotel room, Victor asked what time they’d be meeting at the arena.  After hearing it wouldn’t be until much later (since for Victor it was only the exhibition skate) Victor thanked Yakov again and made his way into the room he was staying in.

          Setting his coffee down next to the laptop that had stayed in his room while he was visiting Yuuri, Victor allowed himself to relax for a moment.  Yakov would be staying with Georgi today so Victor could resettle after his flight.  Sitting down on the edge of the bed Victor slowly laid back and just remembered the night before.  Yuuri’s hands running all over his body, Yuuri’s mouth and teeth marking him as he’d asked, Yuuri fucking him just the way he’d wanted.  They didn’t usually do quite as much as they’d allowed themselves last night, but then again, they’d been spoiled by their own presence before Nationals.  This physical separation hadn’t been easy on either of them, but Victor felt almost sick with the lack of physical contact he was used to getting from Yuuri. 

          Thankfully, the last two days with Yuuri had helped quite a bit.  Of course, the quiet soreness of his body helped, just as he’d known it would, but just spending time with Yuuri without sex would have helped Victor.  He was so thankful for the security of having Yuuri as his best friend and fiancé after all the years he’d spent by himself.  And he’d told Yuuri he wasn’t interested in participating in the Olympics.  It had been a good trip for them.

          It had also been fun to spend time with Yurio.  Victor hadn’t realized how much he’d missed the younger skater while he’d accompanied Yuuri, but it had been great to just kick back and watch movies with two of his favorite people.  He’d almost become jealous of the two of them bonding over anime, but when they’d invited him to share their time it reminded him of why he’d come to think of Yurio as family.  The boy might spit like an angry cat, but if you could get past his rough exterior he was a wonderful person to be around.

          Standing up, Victor began the process of gathering what he needed for a shower.  He wanted to be fully awake and prepared before he had this talk with Phichit.

~*~

          When he felt ready, Victor sent Phichit a message through Instagram letting him know anytime was good to Facetime.  Then he got his laptop ready for whenever Phichit contacted him. 

          While he waited, Victor ordered room service and texted Yurio to let him know he was going to be talking to Phichit soon. 

 **Yurio:**   Did you actually read any of that stuff he sent you?

 **Victor:** Yes, I read the bit about panic attacks.  Have you read anything about anxiety, Yurio?

 **Yurio:**   Yes, I have.  I like to know what I’m getting into instead of jumping into situations like you.

 **Victor:** So…after I talk to Phichit would you like to help me with some of this anxiety research?

 **Yurio:** Da.  But don’t tell Katsudon.

          Victor grinned at how obvious it was Yurio cared far more for Yuuri than he’d ever admit to.  Of course, he’d already proven that with his determination to keep Yuuri from retiring, but it made Victor’s heart sing to see other people’s love for Yuuri.

          Just then, Victor’s laptop dinged with Phichit’s incoming Facetime.

          As the connection was made Victor could see Phichit with what looked like his room behind him.  After smiling and greeting each other, Phichit took a breath as a look of determination came over his face.  “Did you read the article I sent you, Victor?”

          Victor nodded.  “I did, and I think this is a good idea because some of what was in that article I’ve never experienced with Yuuri.”

          Phichit made a thoughtful noise before asking, “What have you seen so far?”

          Victor thought about how Yuuri had gotten so anxious at the Cup of China event and relayed the events to Phichit.  Phichit nodded as Victor explained everything before saying, “Okay, so you’ve seen an anxiety attack where he gets stuck inside his head.  Those are much more common that a full-blown panic attack, so I guess it’s a good thing that you’re already familiar with those.”  Phichit stopped for a moment and looked away from the laptop screen.  When he turned back around Victor was surprised by the look on his face.

          “Look, Victor, I need you to understand something.  I’m not telling you this stuff to make Yuuri feel bad, and he probably would hate it if he knew we were talking about this.  Yuuri’s so ashamed of his anxiety and nothing I’ve tried has gotten him to understand that he doesn’t **have** to be ashamed of it.  I’m hoping that maybe you can help him in a way I couldn’t.  Yuuri’s my best friend and all I want is for him to be happy.  So please just take whatever you can from what I’m going to tell you and keep in mind that Yuuri’s not going to like us talking about it, okay?”

          Victor sat for a moment thinking about what Phichit had just said.  Finally, he nodded.  “Okay.  I’ll make sure not to tell him about this until I feel like he’s in a good enough head space to not get upset with us.  But I do want to let him know eventually, Phichit.  I don’t like keeping things from Yuuri.”

          Phichit shot him a blinding grin.  “That’s exactly what I wanted to hear from you.  It’s so great that you two are so open with each other – Yuuri’s needed someone like you in his life for a long time now.”

          Victor allowed himself a small smile.  “I’ve needed someone like Yuuri, as well.  Our relationship makes both of us better.”

          Phichit reached over and grabbed a mug of tea to take a sip before leaning back in his chair.  “Okay, Victor.  I’m going to tell you about the first panic attack Yuuri had when we were skating together in Detroit.  It was scary as hell and he was a wreck all day afterwards, but you need to know what to do.  Are you ready?”

          There was a knock on Victor’s door, and he asked Phichit if he could wait a moment while he got his room service.  After tipping the food service worker, Victor grabbed his own mug of tea before sitting down in the front of the laptop again.

          “Okay, I’m ready,” Victor said as he made himself comfortable.

          Phichit sighed before leaning forward onto his crossed arms.  “It was finals week and Yuuri was so stressed out from tests and he hadn’t been skating well.  He’d fallen on his triple axel several times in practice and Ciao Ciao was getting ready to tell him to take a break when he started breathing funny.  I skated up to him to see if he was alright, but he couldn’t even hear me.  He was grabbing at his hair and hyperventilating, then his fell onto his knees on the ice.  I didn’t know what to do – it sounded like he was dying.  Ciao Ciao had run off once he realized what was happening, and came back to the boards with this soaking wet hand towel.  He yelled at me to put it on Yuuri’s neck, and Victor this thing was ice cold when I grabbed it.  But after I put it across the back of Yuuri’s neck it snapped him out of it enough to recognize me.  He was still gasping for air, but I could get an arm around him and drag him over to the rink opening.  Once we were off the ice, Ciao Ciao sat him down and made him look at his face so he could see how Coach was breathing.  Ciao Ciao made Yuuri start breathing in through his nose and out through his mouth, and after about fifteen minutes, Yuuri was finally breathing normally again.  The whole thing took about half an hour from start to finish, but Yuuri was exhausted for the rest of they day.  Ciao Ciao told him to take the next day off from the rink and just concentrate on school.” 

          Phichit took a deep breath before grabbing his tea again.  “The thing that sucked the most was that Yuuri tried to hide afterward.  Like he thought I was going to think less of him.  I had to practically drag him out of his bedroom because he didn’t think I’d want to be around him.  And here’s what kills me, Victor.  Yuuri is the strongest person I know, but his anxiety makes him think he’s weak.  I’m hoping maybe you can help him understand how special he really is,” Phichit finished.

          Victor sat for a moment, thinking about what Phichit had just told him while he held his mug.  He could understand exactly what Phichit meant about Yuuri thinking he was weak, because he’d seen it himself.  He also knew how strong Yuuri really was, and it warmed his heart that Phichit was able to see it, too.

          Clearing his throat, Victor gave Phichit a small smile.  “Does Yuuri know how lucky he is to have a friend that cares so much about him?”

          Phichit grinned back.  “I think he does, yeah.  But in all fairness, Yuuri puts up with a lot from me, too.  Before I forget, I have something to send you guys.  Believe it or not, JJ sent it to me.”

          Victor raised his eyebrows.  “JJ sent you something to send to us?  Should I expect a small JJ that will sing its own praise?”

          Phichit blinked before chuckling.  “Normally, yes.  But this is different.  You remember how JJ freaked out at the Grand Prix Final?  He’s starting using something to help him calm down and he got one for Yuuri, too.  Apparently, Isabella had noticed how anxious Yuuri was at the Rostelecom Cup and mentioned it to JJ.  So, he bought a second one of these things and asked me to send it to Yuuri because he felt like he’s snubbed Yuuri at Rostelecom.”

          Victor was curious now.  “What is this thing he sent you?”

          Phichit reached behind him and grabbed a box.  He opened it up and help up a smaller box to show Victor.  “It’s called a Muse headband.  It teaches you how to meditate mindfully by being more aware of your breathing.  JJ said it’s really helped him to calm down before competitions.  There’s a carrying case for it, too.  I just wasn’t sure what address to send it to, so I wanted to ask.”

          Victor made a mental note to look this Muse headband up after he was done talking with Phichit.  “We’ll give it a try – I don’t think it can make Yuuri’s anxiety worse.”  After giving Phichit the address for his apartment in Russia, Victor leaned back in his chair.  “Thanks for telling me all this, Phichit.  We’ll all have to get together sometime.  I think Yuuri really misses hanging out with you.”

          “That sounds, great!  I’d love to come hang out with you guys sometime.  As happy as I am for you and Yuuri, I do miss hanging out with him,” Phichit said.  “I’m going to get off here, for now.  When would be a good time for you to get the package?”

          Victor thought about how long it would take for a package to get from Thailand to Russia.  “I think anytime you send it will be fine.  Yuuri will be back in a couple of days and we can try it out once he gets back.”

          They said goodbye to each other and signed off their Facetime.  Victor sat quietly thinking about what Phichit had said before remembering to look up the Muse headband.  After he’d pulled up the main website, Victor walked over to where he’d left his food and began gathering what he wanted to eat.  It seemed Yurio’s offer to help would be a good thing as Victor didn’t really know the first thing about research.

 

 

The Muse headband is a real thing which can be found [here](http://www.choosemuse.com/).  It's made in Canada which is why I had JJ introduce it to Phichit.  I own one and these little suckers are great at teaching you how to calm your body down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heads up that I probably won't get to update this again until July because June is going to be hella busy on the RL end. Also, the next chapter is going to have an actual, real time panic attack in it. I think I'm going to do an outline of everything that happens while the panic attack is occurring so that if people need to skip it they can. The outline will be posted at the end of the next chapter and I'll put a reminder in the top notes.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the long awaited chapter with a massive panic attack, so hang onto your seats and possibly grab some tissues. I ended up writing the panic attack from Yurio's POV, but next chapter will have Yuuri talking about it. Also, keep an eye on the tags as I'll be updating them along with the story for anything that might be triggering. 
> 
> For those who would rather not read the section with the panic attack, it starts after ********* I will also be including a very brief breakdown of what happens during that scene after the end of the chapter for those who want to skip it.

Here's a thing I drew some inspiration from for this [chapter](https://t.co/uEQ5ubhCy6).  Oh, and this is my tumblr as well. 

 

         Yurio glanced around Victor’s apartment from where he was sitting on the couch.  Normally he’d just crash here tonight, but since they’d just gotten back from Japan he was pretty sure Victor and Yuuri were going to want to time to themselves.  He figured he could snag more of Yuuri’s FMA ’03 collection before he went back to Lilia’s, so it was all good.

          The three of them were going to be hitting the ice hard since the European championships were just around the corner, and Yurio had begun to wonder if Victor was going to want to change any of Yuuri’s programs.  He wouldn’t be competing in the European championships after all, and going into the Four Continents Championship and then Worlds with a different program might give him an edge.  Normally a skater wouldn’t consider changing programs this late in the game, but he’d learned not to put anything past either Yuuri or Victor.

          Yurio heard some murmuring from the bedroom where Yuuri had gone to drop off his bedroom and rolled his eyes.  “Hey, Katsudon!  Can I borrow some of your FMA before I leave?”

          Yuuri poked his head around the door of the bedroom and blinked at him.  “You’re leaving?”

          “Well, yeah.  I figured the two of you would want some alone time,” Yurio said pointedly.

          Yuuri frowned and turned back to look at Victor.  Yurio felt his eyebrows climb as Victor wandered into the living room.  This was not going as he’d planned it and it was looking like they expected him to stick around.  Which…would be alright except that he didn’t really want to see them being handsy all night.

          “How about this,” Victor suggested as he looked at what wasn’t available in the kitchen.  “We have something delivered and watch one of these other movies you two are always talking about before you leave.  It’ll be so nice when Makkachin is back, don’t you think Yuuri?”

          “Yeah, I miss him, too,” Yuuri said.  He glanced over at the somewhat confused blond.  “Well?  What do you think?”

          “Uhh sure?” Yurio was trying to play this cool, but he was genuinely confused.  Finally he shrugged and nodded.  “Okay what kind of food do you guys want?”

          “Something warm,” Victor said and he came up behind Yuuri and hugged him.  They were being cuddly, but not in an uncomfortable way, and Yurio figured tonight might be fun. 

          “What movie do you want to watch, Yurio?”  Yuuri shot him a small smile from Victor’s embrace. 

          Yurio pursed his lips together.  “I’ll pick out the movie if you guys take care of the food, how’s that.”

          Victor walked over to grab the multitude of take out menus while Yurio went to where the DVD’s were.  Between the three of them they were able to decide on the movie and dinner.  The two Yuris were well on the way to introducing Victor to the beautiful dichotomy of anime.  He loved the artwork and, as they predicted, got very emotionally involved in the plot.  Yurio had chosen Wolf Children both because it was an excellent film, and they really needed something to judge how well Victor would handle FMA.  Based on his reactions, they thought that if they went slowly with FMA: Brotherhood and enforced some needed breaks, Victor might just be ready for it.

          Yurio had called Lilia to come and get him, and they’d already cleaned up from their meal and movie.  It had indeed been a good night and Yurio was grateful he hadn’t just left earlier as he’d intended.  The two older skaters were cuddling on the couch as he heard Lilia’s knock on the door.  Calling out a goodbye to them, Yurio made his way out to where Lilia was standing.

          “Well?  Did they enjoy their time together?” she enquired with an arched brow.

          “Da.  You did a good thing, there.” Yurio smiled up at the woman who’d freaked him out a bit in the beginning.  Lilia was a much softer touch than most people would believe.

          “Good.  Katsuki has done much to help your skating team, so it was right to thank him.  Come now, it’s time for you to get to bed, Yuri.”

          Grabbing his travel bag, Yuri followed her down the stairs and out to her car.  He was looking forward to the rest of this skating season in a way he’d never really expected.  This season was going to push him in a way he’d never experienced before and he couldn’t wait to see what happened.

~*~

          Sometime in the middle of the night Yuuri groaned and went to pull a nonexistent blanket up.  As he was trying to figure out where the blankets had gone, Victor stirred underneath him.  Blinking up at him, Victor yawned.  “Did we fall asleep on the couch?”

          Yuuri shook his head a bit and tried to understand what Victor had said before realizing it had come out in Russian.  He was slowly getting better at basic Russian, but not good enough to understand what Victor had just asked.  Yuuri lifted his head and looked around before looking back at Victor and mumbling in English, “I think we fell asleep on the couch.”

          Victor nodded, then motioned Yuuri to get up.  Stumbling together toward the bedroom, Victor managed to snag Yuuri around the waist and nuzzle his neck.  “Hmm we get to sleep in my bed for once,” he mumbled.

          Yuuri turned so he was walking backwards once they were past the doorway.  Slowly, he led them to the bed before pulling Victor down with him.  “Well technically it’s our bed now, right,” he teased.

          Victor’s expression shifted slightly before he moved closer to kiss Yuuri.  “I love the sound of that,” he whispered before pulling back to meet Yuuri’s gaze.

          Yuuri smiled softly before giving Victor a chaste kiss.  “Time for sleep, Vitya.  Feel free to wake me up in the morning with whatever you just thought of.”  Rolling over he grabbed the edge of the covers and squirmed under them before lifting enough on his other side so Victor could get underneath as well.

          Before lying back down, Victor took his shirt off.  He was tired enough to sleep with his sweats on, but he just couldn’t do a shirt.  Spooning up behind Yuuri, Victor took a long breath.  Their bed smelled like sheets and Yuuri.  Victor drifted back to sleep feeling like he was finally home.

~*~

          Waking up the next morning was a new experience for Victor.  He slowly woke up to the feeling of Yuuri drooling on his shoulder, which he would laugh at later, but for now was just too content to do much more than notice the wet.  Shifting his head slightly, Victor breathed in the scent of Yuuri’s hair before rolling so he could get the younger man into his arms. 

          Slowly, Victor began running his hand soothingly along Yuuri’s back underneath his shirt.  Being with Yuuri for a few months now had taught him that patience was the key to a good morning with the Japanese skater.  After a few moments, Yuuri moved his head and mumbled something.  Victor scooted down a bit so he could press a kiss beside Yuuri’s mouth and waited for his love to open his eyes. 

          Victor laid his head down on his pillow while Yuuri began blinking his eyes open.  A small smile appeared on Victor’s face as he took in the look of irritation at being awake in the first place that always came over Yuuri’s face first thing in the morning.  Yuuri hated waking up, he’d never be a morning person, but he did love seeing Victor there with him once he was passed the initial irritation.

          Victor stroked a hand over Yuuri’s cheek as the dark-haired man finally gave him a small smile.  “Good morning, love,” Victor said softly.

          The smile grew on Yuuri’s face before a full yawn took over.  “Mmm.  I like your place,” he said softly before snuggling into Victor’s embrace.

          “As you reminded me last night, it’s our place, Yuuri.  What would you like to do for your first full day in St. Petersburg?” Victor said this into Yuuri’s hair as he snuggled the smaller man against him.  This feeling of contentment wasn’t one he was used to feeling in his apartment, but it was one he could get used to.

          Yuuri chuckled in Victor’s chest.  “I’ve got a few ideas,” he said before shifting slightly to begin mouthing his way up Victor’s chest. 

          Victor’s eyes widened at this.  It was far from unpleasant, but Yuuri didn’t usually initiate anything this early in the morning.  Lying back as Yuuri continued making his way up, Victor closed his eyes and enjoyed the attention.  He already knew what Yuuri was going for and practically melted when Yuuri’s breath warmed that spot behind his ear.

          “Vitya, you were holding back while we were in Japan,” Yuuri’s voice was lower than normal.  It was affecting Victor ns just the way Yuuri was counting on, and he barely managed to hold back a whimper as Yuuri nipped his neck.  “And I understand you take your coaching duties very seriously, but this morning you’re my fiancé.  And I expect you to take care of me, Vitya.”  Yuuri pulled back a bit to show Victor just how serious he was in this.  “I want to feel you, Vitya.  No more holding back.”

          Victor pulled in a shuddering breath as he got himself into the mindset Yuuri needed.  Slowly he lifted both his hands to bring Yuuri in for a commanding kiss.  “It’s only fair since you did what I asked in Japan.  What would you like, my Yuuri?”

          Yuuri’s eyes smiled at him.  “I want to feel you tomorrow, Vitya.  When I’m on the ice I want to know you were there inside me.  Make me feel you when I’m working on my jumps, okay?”

          Victor moved his left hand further back to tug enough on the hair for Yuuri to feel it.  “Are we planning on leaving the apartment today, Yuuri?”

          Yuuri gasped at the feeling of Victor beginning to give him what he wanted.  “Mmm.  Later, maybe for a late lunch,” he got out just before Victor flipped them. 

          Victor had his hands on Yuuri’s shirt now, pulling it up over his head so he could get his hands all over Yuuri’s chest.  “Maybe we should just order delivery,” he said lowly as he latched onto Yuuri’s right nipple.  Yuuri arched up into his touch and Victor pulled away to make short work of their remaining clothing. 

          Yuuri propped himself up on his arms to watch as Victor scooted down to settle next to Yuuri’s right calf.  With a predatory smile, Victor turned his head and began licking and biting up Yuuri’s leg.  “I wonder, do you think I can make you come just by marking you, Yuuri?  You do so love to be touched, don’t you?  I could do this for hours; how long do you think you can stand it?”

          Yuuri bit his lip and whined.  This was the side of Victor he’d needed, and he knew Victor would give him just what he’d asked for.  He also knew that they weren’t leaving the bed for at least an hour, if not longer.  As Victor made his very slow way up Yuuri’s body, Yuuri’s arms gave out and he collapsed onto the bed to let Victor give his body what it needed.

~*~

          The transition of living together in Victor’s apartment was going so smoothly Yuuri felt the constant need to pinch himself.  The only issue they’d had was food.  It had been so easy in Hasetsu since they’d stayed at the Katsuki’s onsen and food was always in some form of preparation.  Now the two of them were responsible for their own meals, and it was harder to make time for food that worked with both of their nutritional needs than Yuuri had really been prepared for.

          Yuuri and Victor took turns cooking, but they went shopping together since Yuuri needed help reading Cyrillic.  Sometimes Yurio would send Victor a list of things to get so he could come over and cook for them, too.  Yuuri had been on the phone for a while with both his mother and Mari to get some recipes from home that weren’t too fattening for him to eat during skating season.  He did have the katsudon recipe, but that was for special occasions, only.

          Their schedules were incredibly busy as well.  Thankfully, the apartment wasn’t far from the skating rink they all practiced at, but they’d had to learn to stagger their schedules.  Since Victor was an early riser he’d go to the rink first thing in the morning.  Victor didn’t need an alarm to wake up at 6 am, so by 6:30 he’d be at the rink.  He would practice until 8 am, then call Yuuri to wake him up for his morning run.  Victor always accompanied him on his bike as he’d already been working his leg muscles and didn’t want to overdo it.  There were times when Yurio would join them for morning runs, but often it was just the two of them.

          After the morning run it was back to the apartment for an early lunch before the two would head back to the skating rink.  The next three hours were devoted to Victor coaching Yuuri while Yakov yelled at whichever of his skaters were on the ice at the time.  Yuuri and Victor brought a packed meal with them so that once Yuuri’s training was done they could sit down and eat together.  Then Victor was back on the ice to get yelled at by Yakov while Yuuri would walk over to Lilia’s studio where he and Yurio would practice ballet.  By the end of their ice training days, Victor and Yuuri were both tired and ready for a bath.  Luckily, Victor’s apartment had a huge bathtub so when they soaked there was room for both to stretch out.  It made Yuuri miss the hot springs he’d grown up with, but the tub was the next best thing.

          Yakov had all the skaters on a rotating schedule so they did get days off.  Victor and Yuuri were always at the rink on the same days (it was the only way this whole idiotic coaching thing would work, as Yakov constantly reminded them) and a couple of days a week the team would go on a run together. 

While Victor was affable with all his teammates, Yurio seemed to be closest to Mila on the team.  In all honesty, no one could stand to listen to Georgi ramble about his newest girlfriend for more than a few minutes.  Mila did float between hockey team members, but she always had interesting topics and articles to talk about.  Yurio just couldn’t find anything in common with Georgi, so for the most part the only conversations the two of them had were on skating.

Yurio had taken his research on anxiety and calming techniques seriously, which he loved to remind Victor.  It rather worked in both of their favor as he’d been showing Victor some of the more inventive techniques he’d found (he just couldn’t picture himself doing some of the things he’d found, so he wouldn’t subject Yuuri to them) when Yuuri walked out of the bedroom to see them both peering at Yurio’s laptop.

Victor had been waiting for the right moment to bring up the conversation with Phichit, as well as introduce the Muse headband, and with Yuuri’s curious inquiry he was able to bring it all up.  Yurio sat in silence in the beginning, but as Yuuri had at first blinked in astonishment which transformed into a small, flustered smile, he began to talk about the things he’d found. 

The three of them sat on the couch looking over all the sites and articles Yurio had found before Victor jumped up to grab the package Phichit had mailed to them.  Yurio side-eyed Yuuri before saying, “You’re really okay with this?  We thought you might be angry about it.”

Yuuri thoughtfully looked away for a moment before seeming to gather himself and glance back at Yurio.  “Before you and Victor came to Hasetsu I would have gotten angry.  It’s embarrassing to have anxiety issues to the extent that I have them, but I’m tired of them ruling my life.  I **love** skating, and if I want to continue on this level I have to get a handle on this stuff.  And it really means a lot to me that both of you put all this time into looking up things that could help me.  And, of course, Phichit made himself a part of this,” he added dryly as Victor plopped back down with the box.

Victor met Yuuri’s gaze and huffed a bit.  “Phichit gave me some really good information, Yuuri, so don’t get irritated with him.  I probably wouldn’t have thought about calming techniques without his help, and we both know this is something you need to work on.”

Yuuri nodded to himself at Victor’s words, while Yurio began to think he might be able to use the same approach to get Victor more invested in his own self-care when it came to his bouts with depression.  Since meeting Yuuri, Victor’s depression hadn’t been nearly as bad, but something like that didn’t just go away. 

The three of them looked over some of the information on the Muse website before Victor opened the box and began physically examining the headband.

“Huh,” Yurio said.  “This says it can help with peak performance, too.  And if we all download the app on our phones we can each have our own profile.  Where did Phichit hear about this, again?”

Victor snorted.  “JJ of all people.  I still can’t believe he was able to focus on someone other than himself long enough to think it might help, but the headband looks good.”

Yuuri side-eyed Victor with a sour look.  “Victor.  JJ isn’t that bad.”

Two Russian heads turned simultaneously to see if Yuuri had been replaced by an alien.  He looked at one, then the other, before frowning.  “What?!?” he exclaimed.

“Katsudon, JJ is the most annoying skater in the senior division right now.  Why the fuck are you being nice to him?” Yurio demanded.

“Well, he volunteers in his off time!  And he’s not all bad, he just acts confident so his nerves won’t show.  And, look, he reached out to us and…”  Looking between the two of them again, Yuuri observed, “Wow, you guys really don’t like JJ, huh?”

“He dismissed you as a competitor, Yuuri.  I have no sympathy for someone who is that callous in dealing with people, especially his competitors.  Besides, it was technically his fiancé who reached out to us.”  Victor was deadly serious as he said this while Yurio nodded along with everything he said.

Yuuri gaped at them.  “But, we need to send a thank you card or something.  It’s only polite to thank someone, so I guess we can address it to both of them.  How are we going to get their address?”

Yurio glared.  “I’m not talking to JJ on Instagram or anything else.”

The steely look wasn’t leaving Victor’s face, either, so Yuuri could tell it was going to be up to him.  “Fine, I’ll ask him for his information,” he said lowly.

Yurio gaped at him while Victor began to chuckle.  “Oh, this is rich!  JJ is the one who gets you to finally start using your Twitter account.  Phichit is going to have a ball with this.”

Yuuri’s eyes widened before he let his head fall against the back of the couch.  “Oh great.  I didn’t even think about that.  Phichit’s gonna make me get on Twitter more often.  At least I won’t have a lot of time for it since we’re all training so much.”

Victor got up to go charge the headband while Yurio grabbed his phone to download the Muse app.  “Just so you know, I’m using that thing too, Victor,” the blond called out.

Victor grinned over at them.  “Sure!  If we all like it I might order another one to keep at the rink.  Can you both imagine Yakov being a bit more Zen?”

Yurio blinked rapidly.  “Damn.  I need to order one for Lilia to keep at her place, too,” he muttered.

Yuuri laughed softly.  “Why don’t we see if we like it before anyone goes ordering more of them?”

“That’s a great plan, Yuuri.  Now, Phichit mentioned breathing exercises when we talked.  How do you feel about practicing some mindful breathing with me?” Victor ran his fingers through Yuuri’s hair as he stood beside him next to the couch.  Yuuri closed his eyes for a moment and savored the feeling before looking up and meeting Victor’s eyes.

“Yeah, okay.  That sounds like a good idea.”

Yurio kept his spot on the couch as Victor lead Yuuri to a spot on the floor where they sat down across from each other.  Victor had Yuur sit in a relaxed lotus position with his hands on his knees.  Victor then mirrored the position and began demonstrating breathing in through his nose for the count of 4, then breathing out through his mouth for the count of 8.  This type of breathing really works the diaphragm and encourages the body to relax.

They worked on mindful breathing for a few minutes, with Victor checking to see how Yuuri was feeling about all this.  Yurio quietly watched the process and felt something settle within him.  Just being here while the other two worked on breathing allowed him to feel like he was part of it, too.  And Yurio was used to doing things on his own, but the more time he spent with Victor and Yuuri, the more he realized that he liked being a part of their little family. 

~*~

*********

Training was hard underway for all the skaters two weeks out from the European Championships, and Yakov had Victor working on his free program on the ice.  Yuuri had been working on part of his own program, but had moved over to the boards while Yakov and Victor were working.  He watched his fiancé move across the ice and marveled that all this had occurred.  Yuuri had heard that some couples get complacent in their relationships, but every day he would find a moment to be awed by the fact that his life was what it was now.

Yurio was sitting outside the rink munching on a snack and looking over phone notifications.  One of them had him blinking before saying softly, “No way.”  In his excitement, Yurio forgot where he was and stood up excitedly.  “Yuuri!”

Several heads snapped his way immediately, because Yurio was **willingly** calling out Yuuri’s name at a loud volume.  Unfortunately, Victor was one of those who looked at Yurio.  He had just left the ice in triple axel and the act of wrenching his head around pulled his jump completely off balance.  In seconds, Victor had crashed badly onto the ice and to the horror of everyone at the rink, wasn’t moving.

Things happened so quickly, and yet Yurio felt as if time had stopped.  A horrible sound came out of Yuuri when Victor hit the ice and just **lay** there.  Yurio froze momentarily, before biting out several curses in Russian.  Yakov was already screaming at one of the assistant coaches to get their on-call medic here immediately.  Yuuri had begun to stumble towards Victor, but he was moving strangely.

Yurio yanked his skate guards off because **he needed to be out there** , and ran for the rink entrance.  Just as he hit the ice, where Victor was breathing but still not moving, Yuuri fell to his knees.  Yurio switched direction to detour to the Japanese skater, whose breath now sounded awful.  Phichit had warned Victor, and Victor had relayed the information, but seeing it was completely different. 

Yuri fell to the ice in front of Yuuri who was now gasping for air as if his lungs just wouldn’t fill.  Yuuri’s hands were clenched in his hair with his gaze fixed on where Victor was lying, but it was like he just wasn’t there.  Yurio didn’t touch him for fear of making it worse, but talking wasn’t doing any good.  Almost in tears himself, Yurio looked over to see Yakov stumbling over to Victor on the ice.

Yurio swallowed and yelled over to Yakov, “Yakov!  I can’t get Yuuri to hear me!  What do I do?”

Yakov glanced up from where he’d tentatively felt Victor’s head without moving it.  “Shit!”  Glancing over to another of the assistant coaches, Yakov had the woman run off for the towel Victor had told him he might one day need.  “You know how to do the breathing they were working on?”  At Yurio’s nod, Yakov said, “When she brings the towel you put it over the back of his neck.  Victor told me before it should bring him out of the panic attack long enough for you to get his attention.  When that happens, you get him to breathe with you, Yuratchka.  I’ve got to see to Victor, now.”

Victor was beginning to very slowly make some movements, and Yuuri’s breath began having sobs attached.  The assistant coach came back with the hand towel and Yurio skated over and grabbed it.  As fast as he could, he made his way back over to Yuuri and carefully placed the towel around the back of his neck. 

The feeling of wet and cold broke through the panic momentarily, and Yurio grabbed Yuuri’s shoulders.  Getting as close to the older skater as he dared, Yurio said, “I need you to focus, now.  We’re going to breathe, okay Yuuri?  You know how to do this, come on now.”

Desperately, Yuuri’s eyes locked on Yurio’s and he made himself attempt to comply.  It took several moments before Yuuri’s breathing began to resemble anything close to normal, and as soon as he could, Yuuri gasped out, “Victor?!”

The medic ran past them on the ice over to where Victor was being held down on the ice by Yakov until he’d been checked out.  Yurio glanced over at them, then back at Yuuri.  “I’ll take you over there, but you have to keep breathing, okay?”

At the shaky nod, Yurio and Yuuri slowly stood and made their way over to the small group on the ice.  Victor rolled his head to look at them and shifted enough to flop his hand out toward Yuuri.  The medic snapped at him to hold still, but that really wasn’t a possibility right now. 

Yuuri collapsed onto the ice as close as he could get to Victor and scrabbled for his hand.  Yurio plopped down as well and put his head into his hands.  God, this was all his fault.  If he wasn’t so pigheaded and used Yuuri’s name more often, Victor wouldn’t have looked at him.  The panic attack wouldn’t have happened and they’d all be happily bitching about practice right now.

After a cursory head exam, the medic moved on to checking out the rest of Victor.  His eyes weren’t quite responding as they should be, so the medic got an ambulance on the radio to come and take him to the nearest hospital for observation just in case there was a concussion.  Yuuri was crying quietly into Victor’s hand.  Yurio bit his lip savagely.  Fuck!  Angry tears were beginning to make their way down his face.

When he couldn’t take it anymore, Yurio stumbled to his feet and skated to the opening.  Not even bothering with his skate guards, he sat down on the floor and yanked his skates off.  Getting up, he ran to the locker room and curled up in a dark corner.  Finally letting go, Yurio sobbed into his arms. 

It felt like ages, but only about 15 minutes had passed when Yurio pulled his phone out of his hoodie pocket where he’d stashed it during the insanity on the ice.  With trembling fingers, Yurio selected Otabek from his contacts and pressed the call button.

To Yurio’s relief, Otabek picked up after two rings.  “Yura?  I thought you were training?”

Yurio drew in a breath, before saying softly, “Yeah I was.  Something happened, and it’s all my fault.”

Silence for a moment, then Otabek’s voice came back over the line.  “Are you alright?”

Yurio laughed a bit angrily.  “Oh yeah, I’m great.  Victor’s going to the hospital and Yuuri had a fucking panic attack and all of it was **my fault**.  The European Championships are in two weeks!  I don’t even know if Victor’s going to be able to skate in them, and you want to know if I’m okay.”  He banged his head back against the wall in frustration.

Otabek took a breath on the other end of the line.  “Of course, I’m going to ask if you’re okay.  That’s what friends do when people who should be practicing call them during their training time.  Do you want to tell me what happened?”

Yurio took in a shaky breath.  “Yeah.  Okay.”  Slowly, he told him about what had happened, fully expecting Otabek to be as angry with him as he was at himself.  Once he was done, Otabek was silent for a couple of moments before saying, “None of that was your fault.  It sucks but really Victor should have known better than to get distracted in the middle of a jump.  We’re all taught early on not to do that.  And it sounds to me like you really stepped up with Yuuri.  I mean, if you hadn’t calmed him down he might have passed out.”

Yurio blinked rapidly.  “You really think so?” he asked quietly.

“Yeah I do.  Why are you so hard on yourself, anyway?” There was a laugh in Otabek’s voice as he asked the question.  “Why don’t you go see what’s happening?  I bet they’re starting to worry about you if you ran off.”

Yurio took in a startled breath.  “Oh.  I didn’t think of that.  Thanks, Beka,” he added gratefully.

“You’re welcome, Yura.  Call me later and tell me how everyone’s doing?”

Yurio nodded as he made to get up from the floor.  “Da.  I need to call Phichit, too.  He’ll want to talk to Yuuri.”

Feeling calmer, Yurio got off the phone with Otabek and made his way out of the locker room and back to the rink.  Victor had been loaded onto a gurney for the ambulance and Yuuri was walking next to him, still holding his hand.  Yakov looked as if he could use a stiff drink while the assistant coach looked emotionally worn out.  Yurio picked up his skates from where he’d thrown them and placed them on top of one of the benches, along with his skate guards.

Yakov glanced over as Yurio made his way over to them.  “Oh, there you are.  Good job out there, I don’t think anyone else could have done that with Victor injured.  Did you want to ride to the hospital with me?”

Cautiously, Yurio glanced over at Yuuri and Victor, who were speaking in very hushed tones to each other.  “They’re not mad at me?”

Yakov’s eyebrows bunched in confusion.  “Why would they be?”

Yurio blew out a breath he’d been holding.  “Da, I’ll go with you.  I need to call Phichit and let him know what happened, and I guess Minako once we have a better idea what’s going on with Victor.”

Yakov’s face shifted slightly.  “Victor’s very lucky.  He’s got a grade I MCL sprain, but since he’s injured it before we must be more careful.  It will keep him out of the European Championships.  They’re still worried about a possible concussion, so he’s going to spend the night in the hospital for observation.  If all goes well he should be released tomorrow so you and Katsuki can fuss over him.”

Yurio processed this while Yakov looked him over.  “How are you, Yuri?  There was a lot going on there for a bit and I had my hands full with those two.  It’s not easy to see a rink mate injured and I know how close you and Victor are…”

Yurio took in a deep breath before turning to face Yakov.  “I’m okay.  I talked to Otabek and that helped.  Do we need to do anything else?”

Yakov hmmed thoughtfully.  “I suppose it would help to grab them a change of clothes.  How about I call Mila to come and take you over to their place?  You do have a key?”

Yurio nodded.  They’d given him a key once they were all back in St. Petersburg with the rule to call before showing up.  This would be the first time he’d had to use the key, but that’s why they’d given it to him in the first place.

With another glance at the medical team, Yurio made to go back to the locker room.  “I’ll go get all of our things and meet Mila outside.”

Yakov looked at him.  “You don’t want to let them know?”

Yurio shook his head.  “No, I’ll talk to them at the hospital.  I just need to do something,” he muttered.

Yakov nodded in understanding.  “Okay, could you and Mila pick up some food as well?  Victor always complains about hospital food.”

A small smile appeared on Yurio’s face.  “Yakov, everyone complains about hospital food.  Da, we’ll pick something up.”

Yakov clasped a hand on Yurio’s shoulder before walking over to Yuuri and Victor.  Yurio caught Yuuri glancing over at him, but turned to go to the locker room.  He just couldn’t talk to them right now.  Once he was feeling less rattled he’d go and spend some time with them, but not now.  Rolling his shoulders restlessly, Yurio entered the locker room and looked at their various gear. 

Blowing out a breath, he grabbed his phone to update Phichit so the Thai skater could talk to Yuuri.  Then he began gathering their things together.  At least Mila would be the one picking him up instead of Georgi.  Right now, he didn’t think he could deal with Georgi’s melodramatic tendencies.

 

 

Outline of panic attack scene ->

  * Yurio finds something online interesting enough to have him call out Yuuri’s name
  * Victor (mid-jump) jerks his head to look at Yurio and ends up falling badly
  * Yuuri has a massive panic attack as this is too similar to the event in Detroit and it involves Victor
  * Yakov has an assistant coach get a hand towel soaked in ice water and hand it to Yurio
  * Yurio is able to help Yuuri through diaphragmatic breathing until he can get to Victor
  * Yurio needs to decompress and runs to the locker room where he calls Otabek
  * Victor has a grade I MCL reinjury and possible concussion.  This will lead to him missing the European Championships



 

Songs I listened to while writing this chapter would be BTS's [Not Today](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9DwzBICPhdM), Seventeen's [Don't wanna cry](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zEkg4GBQumc), and Adam Lambert's album The Original High

 

I do have a Twitter account [Wintersblight](https://twitter.com/Wintersblight), but I rarely talk about Yuri on Ice there.  I'm much more likely to talk about YOI on my tumblr.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp I got that out quicker than I thought, but no idea when the next one will be coming. Any comments/kudos are greatly appreciated. Thanks a ton for over 2K views now!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have some fluff after that last chapter (I know I needed it.)

The rest of the day had been a blur for Yuuri.  The ride to the hospital had been less jarring emotionally since Victor was awake and talking somewhat, although obviously not up to his normal teasing.  The panic attack had taken its usual toll on Yuuri and once Victor had been settled into a room, Yuuri had zoned out.  At one point the nursing staff had tried to remove Yuuri from Victor’s room since he wasn’t ‘family’ and Yakov had exhibited such an epic screaming fit they’d just decided it was best to just leave him there.  Apparently, the nursing staff had decided Yakov was Victor’s father, which was pointed out to them as incorrect. 

Yakov appointed himself outside the room just in case there were any other ‘issues’ with the nursing staff, while Victor pulled Yuuri up onto the bed with him so they could both nap.  Victor was woken every hour on the dot with the worry of a possible concussion so he didn’t get much sleep early on, but Yuuri slept for two and a half hours once he’d fallen asleep.  A member of the Russian skating family was always waiting in the hallway or the waiting area, and after the second nurse check Victor asked for Yakov to be sent in.

Yakov appeared tired as he walked into the room where Yuuri was still sleeping like the emotionally exhausted man he was.  Victor had an arm wrapped around him while he was sitting slightly inclined, but managed to shoot a rather tired smile at Yakov.

“Are you done worrying all of us now, Vitya?”  Yakov was giving Victor a ruffled, yet concerned look that made Victor laugh briefly in a self-deprecating manner.

“This whole thing was my fault,” Victor admitted.  “I know better than to get distracted once I’ve begun a jump, but I did it anyway.  Do you even know why Yurio got excited enough to call out Yuuri’s name?”

Yakov tiredly rubbed his face before shaking his head no.  “Have you had a chance to talk to Yuuri yet?”  The older man regarded Victor from the seat he had slumped gracelessly into.  The food Yuri and Mila had brought sat uselessly in a bag on the table next to Victor.  Sometime tonight it would probably get eaten, but for not the bag looked somewhat forlorn.

Victor glanced down at his sleeping fiancé.  “No, he was insistent on checking on how I was feeling before he passed out.”  Running a hand over Yuuri’s head, Victor swallowed.  “I’m guessing he had a panic attack and that’s why he’s exhausted now?”

Yakov’s shoulders slumped.  “Da.  It all happened so fast and I’m sorry to say I wasn’t much help to Yuuri.  The information you gave me allowed Yuri to reach him enough to slow his breathing, but in all my years of coaching I’ve never seen anything like that.  He was fighting to get to you and his own body was fighting against him.  I think he would have passed out if Yuri hadn’t been able to get through to him.  Which wouldn’t have happened if the two of you hadn’t been practicing those breathing exercises.”

Thoughtfully, Victor glanced back down at his hand caressing Yuuri’s head.  “My poor, beautiful darling.  You’re so strong, of course it was something that happened to me that brought this out.”  After a few more moments of looking at Yuuri, something else occurred to Victor.  He glanced back over at Yakov.  “How is Yuri doing?  This can’t have been easy on him.”

Yakov leaned back against the chair and closed his eyes.  “I think he’s doing as well as can be expected.  He disappeared for a few minutes into the locker rooms right after he got Yuuri out of the panic attack, but right before you two left in the ambulance I talked to him.  He’s rattled, but I think he’ll be alright.  You should talk to him about this, Vitya.  He seemed to think he was to blame for causing your fall,” Yakov said dryly enough that Victor knew Yakov was telling Victor to own up to his shit.

Victor’s mouth pulled into a sideways frown.  “The entire thing was my fault and I’ll make sure Yuri knows that.  I don’t ever want to be responsible for putting any of you through something like this for a stupid reason again.”

Yakov shot him a satisfied look.  “Good.  I don’t want to have to deal with this again for a stupid reason.  Yuri’s going to stay with Lilia until you’re released, then I suggest you have him stay at your place for a bit.  Between the physical therapy and your clinginess with Yuuri, it would probably be a good thing for all three of you.”

“I’m out for the European Championships, da?”

“Yes, Vitya.  You’re going to be competing directly with both Yuuris at the Worlds, so I expect your training to get serious once you’re recovered.”

Victor thought for a moment before lifting his head to meet Yakov’s gaze.  “Since I’m having to take a break, how would you feel about Yuuri and I going to Hasetsu and officially moving all of our stuff here?  I need to bring Makkachin home anyhow, and I can continue my physical therapy while we’re gone.  Besides, Yuuri swears the hot spring has healing properties.”

Yakov huffed out a laugh.  “Normally I would say no.  But, what else will you do with this time?  At least this way you still have access to training, but not before the set time your physical therapist gave you.  I know you’ll feel better having Makka home.”

With a small smile, Victor smoothed his hand over Yuuri’s hair again.  “Da.  Having all of my family in one place will be wonderful.”

~*~

Yuuri frowned and squirmed a bit before blinking himself awake.  Confusion immediately hit as this room didn’t smell like home, it smelled like antiseptic and stale air.  Stiffening, Yuuri remembered everything.  Before he had a chance to move much more, he felt a familiar warmth against his back and relaxed momentarily.

            “Finally awake, Solnechnyy luchik?” Victor murmured behind him.             Yuuri rolled over to see the most beautiful man in the world smiling tiredly at him.  He brought his hand up to cup Victor’s cheek and felt stubble and beloved skin.  “What have the doctors said?”                        Victor’s eyes traveled over Yuuri’s face before answering.  “We can go home in the morning as long as my eyes are dilating as they should and I don’t have any unexpected head pain.  I’m so sorry, Yuuri.  All of this was my fault.”             Yuuri swallowed.  “I don’t care whose fault it was, I’m just so happy to hear you’re okay, Vitya.  If something had happened to you…”             Victor pulled Yuuri into the warmth of his body.  “Nothing happened to me that I didn’t cause on my own.  And I upset everyone on top of it.  And…” he swallowed.  “I made you have a panic attack.  That I won’t forgive myself for.”                        Yuuri slowly pulled back to meet Victor’s gaze.  “That’s…Vitya it’s not your fault I had a panic attack.  They happen when I get severely stressed.  Of course I’m going to freak out when you’re lying on the ice not moving!  But Yurio helped me pull out of it and…” he glanced around the room.  “Where is everyone?”             Victor let out a low laugh.  “Oh, you were really out of it earlier.  The nursing staff mistook Yakov as my father and tried to kick you out of the room.  I don’t think I’ve ever seen Yakov give medical professionals such a piece of his mind before.  But I did get to talk to him after you fell asleep.  He said Yurio is doing as well as can be expected, but we need to talk to him once we’re both home.”             Yuuri was silent for a few moments, thinking that over.  Finally, he scooted up onto the pillow to breathe in Victor’s scent.  With his eyes closed, Yuuri began talking quietly.                        “When you fell I tried to get to you, but my legs stopped working.  I couldn’t breathe and you were just a few feet away, but I couldn’t get there.  Everything was noise in my head and I couldn’t make anything make sense, just the terror that you were really, really hurt.  I thought the panic attacks I’d had in Detroit were bad, but they were nothing like that one.  You were lying there and I was helpless…I couldn’t even move.  Yurio did something – I don’t even know what it was.  But I felt this icy cold thing across the back of my neck and then he was in front of me making me slow my breathing.  I couldn’t even talk, just focus on what he was saying and try to slow my breathing down.” 

Taking in another breath, Yuuri moved a bit on the pillow so he could snuggle into Victor’s throat.  Helplessly, Victor’s arms came around him and he held the smaller man.  After another few minutes, Yuuri started speaking again. 

“I want to do whatever we have to so that I can break free of them on my own, Vitya.  We’ll use the headband, we’ll do the breathing, we’ll do whatever we can find that isn’t medication to help with this.  I **will not** give in to terror if you’re in danger.  I don’t like that my anxiety can be that debilitating, so we’ll keep working on it.  Okay?”

Victor nodded against the top of Yuuri’s head.  “Da.  I’ll ask Yurio to help me look for some other solutions, too.  He’s very good at finding things online.  And Yuuri?”  Victor pulled back slightly.  He waited until he could meet Yuuri’s gaze before stating, “You are the strongest person I’ve ever met.  Don’t ever think less of yourself.  Most people wouldn’t be willing to stand up and fight to work through something holding them back.  It takes tremendous will to even think about that.  And if we’re going to be working on your anxiety, we need to work on my depression, too.”

Yuuri searched Victor’s eyes before nodding.  “Alright, Vitya.  We’ll both work on getting ourselves better.  And that means we both need to work on telling each other if we’re having a bad day instead of just pushing through it.  We’re both terrible at that,” he added dryly.

A small blush bloomed on Victor’s cheeks.  “Da.  I’m worse at it than you are,” he sighed.  A thought crossed his mind and he glanced over at the food Mila and Yurio had left them.  “Are you feeling hungry?  Yurio and Mila brought us food that isn’t from the hospital.”

Yuuri pursed his lips as he thought about it.  His stomach decided to answer for him by grumbling.  Victor grinned at the sound.  “I need to use the restroom, but why don’t you grab that bag and see what they brought us?”

As Victor got out of the bed, Yuuri sat up and stretched before leaning over to grab the bag of food and his glasses.  Victor heard his crow of delight as he finished in the restroom and washed his hands.  Walking back out into the room, he raised his eyebrows at Yuuri.

“What did they bring us?”

Yuuri grinned at him.  “All your favorites.  And there’s a note to call Yurio when we’ve finished the food.”

With a happy sigh, Victor climbed back into the bed beside Yuuri.  They happily divvied up the food, then Victor pressed the call nurse button to ask for some water.  Despite being in the hospital it ended up being a good evening.

~*~

Yurio was dragging his heels a bit walking down the hallway to Victor’s room.  They were supposed to get discharged this morning (well, Victor was, but everyone knew Yuuri wasn’t going anywhere without him) and so the Russian team had shown up for a show of support and to get them back to Victor’s place.  Yakov, Lilia, and Georgi had shown up in the team van while Mila and Yurio had taken her car.  It was a whole big deal and Yurio was already sick of it, but he couldn’t begrudge anyone wanting to see Victor and Yuuri.  He just wasn’t sure if **he** was ready to see them.

 **Yurio:** Beka do I really have to go into their room?

 **Otabek:** Yura…I thought you wanted to talk to them?

Yurio chewed his bottom lip before turning to kick the nearest wall.  He then turned to flop back against the wall he’d just kicked before answering Otabek.

 **Yurio:** I do, but I don’t know what I’m supposed to say.  I mean, I watched Victor black out on the ice, then Yuuri got so upset he almost made himself pass out and…It was scary as hell Beka.  But I don’t want them to feel bad so what the fuck am I supposed to say?

 **Otabek:** Maybe just follow their lead?  I bet they’ve been worried about you, too.  But if you don’t go in there nobody gets to say anything.

Yurio let his head fall back against the wall again as he thought about what Beka had said.  And, as always, Beka was right.  If he didn’t go in there then this ugly feeling in his gut would just sit there, but it might at least settle down if he could get himself in that room.

 **Yurio:** Okay.  I’ll go in there and I’ll call you later.  What time works for you?

They worked out a time for a phone call later, then Yurio sighed and put his phone into the pocket of his hoodie.  Swallowing, he made himself straighten his shoulders and make his way to the room everyone he knew was in right now.

He could hear voices as he came into the doorway, and since no one else had noticed him yet, he took advantage of the moment to look at Victor and Yuuri.  They both looked a bit tired, but not bad overall.  As he stood there watching, Yuuri’s eyes met his and widened slightly.

They stared at each other for a moment before Victor called out, “Yurio!  Come here, please,” with a genuine smile.

Swallowing again (this really sucked, Yurio didn’t like being this nervous) he made his way to the side Victor was on as Georgi shuffled out of the way.  Before he could say anything, Victor had grabbed him into a full-body hug and he lay stunned for a moment before wriggling to get away. 

“Let go of me, Victor!” Yurio spat as he stumbled away from the bed.  Victor grinned unrepentantly as Yuuri smiled softly.  Yurio saw something pass through Yuuri’s eyes and understood that they’d talk about what had happened later, when not everyone was around.  Victor had managed to deflect all that with one gesture, and now they were all comfortable again.

“So Vitya,” Yakov started.  “Whenever the doctors decide to let you leave we’ve got the van here to take you and Yuuri home.  Do you anything picked up while we’re waiting?”

Victor frowned then looked over at Yuuri.  “Do either of us have a change of clothes here?”

Yuuri shook his head.  “No, but a shower and fresh clothes would be nice.  Are you sure you don’t mind?” he asked Yakov.

“I was going to send Yuri and Mila,” Yakov grinned over at the two youngest members of the skating team.  “You’re both looking a bit restless,” he added.

“I’m going, too,” Lilia announced.  She threw a glance over at Victor and Yuuri.  “Do the two of you have any food in your apartment?”

Yuuri blushed a bit.  “I was going to go shopping last night, but we ended up here instead.”

“Oh good, then I’ll go get some things for you,” Lilia smiled a bit.  Everyone except for Yakov was looking at her a bit oddly, so she quickly explained, “I hate hospitals.”

“I’ll help you,” Yurio quickly threw in.  He didn’t like hospitals much, either.  They smelled funny and had an air of despair around them.

“Mila, do you mind if we take your car?” Lilia asked, but Mila knew she was really being told, so she just snorted and shook her head.  Throwing Lilia the keys, Mila said, “You can fill it with gas while you’re at it.”

With a wave, Lilia and Yurio walked out and down the hallway.  Lilia threw Yurio an amused glance as they continued to Mila’s car.  “Are you feeling better now that you’ve seen them, Yuri?”

Yurio ducked his head to hide a small blush.  He kicked at something invisible and muttered, “Shut up, Lilia.”

 

I've got a ko-fi now, so if you like this [buy me a coffee?](https://www.ko-fi.com/wintersblight)  Comments and kudos are always appreciated, as well.

I mostly listened to [Troye Sivan's](https://www.youtube.com/user/TroyeSivan18) Blue Neighborhood while writing this chapter.

Feel free to interact with me on [Tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/wintersblight) where I mostly gush about YOI and FMA.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I'm going to try to update this monthly, but I'm also writing a memoir and I really need to concentrate on that right now. Please point out any typos I missed as this isn't beta'd.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy early update! Don't expect this to repeat itself ;-)

Everyone can thank [Rennaren](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Rennaren/pseuds/Rennaren) for the entire first scene since her comment generated the idea.  Thanks again for that!

 

The week leading up to Victor and Yuuri leaving for Japan was weird.  There was the physical therapist who would come to the apartment and put Victor through exercises to help his knee heal.  There was Yuuri practically vibrating with the excitement of going home to pack and bring all his stuff back to his new home.  And then there was Yurio, who was feeling a bit third wheelish, no matter what the other two did to mitigate that.  And there was practice at the arena, because none of them could afford to skip practicing now.

About halfway through the week a package arrived at the apartment that Victor was very excited about.  Yurio had pretty much been camped out on the couch since Victor got out of the hospital.  He cleaned up the couch during the day and put all his blankets and his cuddle pillow (that he would never admit to having, **shut up** Victor) out in the evening. 

Yuuri was giving Victor the ‘should I be worried about this’ look while Yurio pasted his ‘I’m patently bored with all this’ look onto his own face.  Victor tore into the package with a child’s glee before pulling out a boxed set of DVDs. 

Victor triumphantly held the boxed set over his head as if it were a medal Yuuri had won.  Yuuri was blinking at him while Yurio was beginning to scowl.  “Victor, what…” Yuuri began only to have the excited Russian interrupt.

“I liked the films you two showed me so much I bought the boxed set!  Now we have all of them and we can catch up while I’m off the ice, Yuuri.”  Victor then turned to address Yurio.  “Don’t worry, we’ll wait until we come back to start your Fullmetal series.”

Both Yuri’s were gaping at Victor, because while they’d known he liked the movies, they didn’t know he’d like them enough to buy the boxed set.  But this was Victor, who had more money than both of them combined, so dropping a few hundred dollars on a boxed DVD set wouldn’t faze him as it would them.

Victor dove back into the box while Yuuri continued to gape at him.  Yurio snorted and moved to claim a spot for himself on the couch.  Victor came up from the box with From Up on Poppy Hill, Graveyard of the Fireflies, and Pom Poko. 

“Look, these are also from the same studio,” Victor cried excitedly before peering at them.  “Ooh I love fireflies,” he muttered while Yurio paled and Yuuri went unnaturally still.

It was uncanny how attuned to Yuuri Victor was, Yurio observed as he watched the older man’s head swing around to peer at his fiancé.  “Yuuri?” he questioned softly, as Yuuri forced himself to take in a deep breath.

Yuuri reached out to pluck Graveyard of the Fireflies from Victor’s hand before he walked over the join Yurio on the couch.  With a concerned look Victor followed so the three of them were sitting on the couch together.

“Yurio, you’ve seen this?” Yuuri questioned softly, still looking down at the DVD in his hands.

Yurio nodded his head, because words weren’t really necessary when it came to that particular movie.  Victor was getting more confused as this went on, and he finally burst out with, “Yuuri!  Is there something wrong with that movie?”

Yuuri leaned his head onto the back of the couch with his eyes closed.  “I’m going to tell you what happened the first time I saw this, Victor.  And I need you to listen to all of it, can you do that?”

Yuuri opened his eyes to regard Victor, who was watching him worriedly.  Victor nodded, and Yuuri reached over to hold his hand.  Then he took a deep breath and began speaking.

“When Mari was thirteen, she bought this with her own money.  I snuck behind her in our private tv room to watch it, because I loved Ghibli films.  I was seven years old at the time, and within the first 30 minutes I’d plastered my hands over my mouth so she wouldn’t hear me.  Victor, this film is about two kids starving to death during World War II in Japan.  She eventually heard me, of course.  Mari was furious at first, but then she was more worried for me.  She stopped the movie and had me come sit with her.  I was crying, but determined to watch the rest of the movie with her.  Mari tried to talk me out of it, but I wanted to see the whole thing.  So, she sat with me while we finished it.”

Yuuri paused to take another deep breath before smiling sadly at Victor.  “When the movie was over, I got up and went to where Mom was in the kitchen.  I was still crying, but I was angry more than sad.  I told her we had to find out if there were any kids in Hasetsu that didn’t have enough food and at the very least take them rice balls.  Mari was standing behind be just completely surprised because she thought I’d be a crying mess.  But this was something I understood.  This was something we could help to make a difference with.  So, Mom called Minako and asked her to find out if there were any families who needed help with food.”

Yuuri trailed off and glanced over toward the window.  “We did that at the beginning of every month right up until I left for Detroit.  I should probably call and ask if they’re still doing that,” his voice trailed off as he turned to meet Victor’s gaze.

Yurio immediately felt like a third wheel again as they just stared at each other.  He wondered frantically if he should just leave, before Victor startled him by grabbing both of them into a huge hug.

“Yuuri!  Please tell your parents I want to help support this.  Maybe we could do something similar to help families here in Russia, as well,” Victor broke the hug off and regarded the two startled faces staring at him.

“I take it we won’t be watching this anytime soon,” he concluded dryly as Yuuri began to laugh.

Yurio sat back and thought about what Victor had just word vomited.  “Hey, Victor.  Are you serious about that?”

Victor kept one arm around Yuuri as he leaned around him to peer at Yurio.  “Of course!  Why, are you interested in something like that?”

“Da.  There are quite a few families I know of in Moscow that could really use the help with food,” Yurio returned with a slight flush.

Yuuri had a soft smile on his face as he glanced from one of them to the other.  The two Russians had come to mean so much to him in different ways.  That both of them were interested in bringing something he’d begin in his own country into theirs filled his heart.  This was just as much his home as his parents’ Onsen was.

~*~

They were back at the arena a couple of days before Yuuri and Victor were to fly out to Japan, and Yuuri was out on the ice practicing his step sequences.  As per usual when he was practicing step sequences, everyone else’s eyes were on him because he really was just that good.  Yuuri, of course, was never aware of this.

Victor walked over to where Yurio was leaning back against the boards watching Yuuri.  He was favoring his leg, but the physical therapist wanted him both standing and sitting, and while at the arena he was on his feet more often than not.

Together they watched Yuuri finish out his sequences before glancing over at the two of them with a smile.  He then moved on to a different part of his choreography he’d wanted to concentrate on.  Victor glanced over to Yurio, who had just grabbed his water bottle.

“So, are you going to tell me why you got excited enough to call out Yuuri’s name when I decided to be stupid?” Victor ventured lowly.

Yurio stiffened slightly before rolling his shoulders.  “I thought he’d be the one to ask me that,” he muttered before glancing over at Victor.

Victor shrugged back, making a point to keep his eyes on Yuuri.  He’d dealt with Yurio long enough to know just how far to push the teen.  “Yuuri doesn’t like making people feel uncomfortable, and he’s very fond of you.  I think he’s willing to let it go, but I’m just too curious.” 

Yurio side-eyed Victor before sighing loudly.  “Fine.  There’s a live-action Fullmetal Alchemist movie coming out at the end of the year and I thought he’d like to see it.”  This was said quickly and quietly while Yurio looked completely away from everything else in the arena.

Victor blinked in surprise before turning to fully face Yurio.  “Really?  You think I could watch enough with both of you to catch up before that comes out?”

Yurio eyed him suspiciously before nodding cautiously.  “Well, yeah.  I mean, it’s January.  The movie doesn’t come out until December.  Are you really interested in this?”

Yuuri had skated up to them to grab his own water bottle.  “What are you guys taking about?” he asked curiously.

Victor grinned at Yurio.  “Well, tell him!  I think this almost makes my whole stupid accident worth it.”

Yurio gaped at Victor before turning to meet Yuuri’s incredulous gaze.  Yuuri’s body language was giving off disbelief after Victor’s statement, and Yurio found himself stumbling for words.

Victor’s grin never faltered as Yurio finally got out the news of the live-action film.  Yuuri’s face lit up in pleasure before he turned an outright glare on Victor.  “As awesome as that is, it doesn’t make up for you getting hurt, Vitya.”

Victor blinked at the fury radiating off of Yuuri while Yurio snorted and skated off as Yakov began to yell for him to get back on the ice.  While he knew how much Victor mean to Yuuri, it always cracked him up to see that Victor just didn’t get it sometimes.  Then again, Victor had been so lonely and focused on pleasing others for such a long time, he just wasn’t used to having someone’s attention focused on him.

Yurio glanced back over to the two of them as he worked on the moves Yakov had directed.  It occurred to him that he was lucky to have Otabek and his skating family, because while he pushed himself, he’d never felt as alone as Victor had.  And if Yuuri had anything to do with it, Victor wouldn’t feel like that again.

Yurio grinned seeing that it looked as if Yuuri was finished chewing Victor out for thinking it was okay that he got hurt.  Victor looked appropriately admonished, and as Yuuri skated by him Yurio shot him a knowing smirk. 

“You told him off good, eh Katsudon?”

Yuuri grinned back.  “Has he always been this bad at taking care of himself?”

Yurio barked a laugh.  “He’s awful at it!  Yakov and I used to have to physically haul him back to his apartment on his bad days.”

Yuuri shook his head before skating over to another area on the rink to practice his spins.  Yurio glanced over to see Lilia speaking softly to Victor, who still looked startled by the exchange.

It’s good for him to finally let people take care of him, Yurio thought.  At least I’ve got some help with that now.  Yakov and Lilia both tried, but he didn’t listen to them like he does Yuuri.

Huffing a breath and dropping down into a spin, Yurio idly thought he needed to chat with Phichit again.  He rather liked talking to the Thai skater, especially since Phichit had no problem pointing out JJ’s self-centeredness.

~*~

Mila was digging through one of the bags of new clothes she’d brought over to Yurio’s room at Lilia’s while Yurio lay on his bed with Potya.  Both Yuuri and Victor had told him to come over as usual, and he’d told them both to suck it cuz he didn’t want to hear them having sex.  They’d been very quiet the nights he’d spent at their place after the hospital, but he knew they needed alone time and he knew he **didn’t** need to hear them.

His phone pinged with a text from Victor.  His texting with Yuuri usually fell off when Yurio did something to embarrass the Japanese man, but Victor was shameless.  Yurio snorted as he read Victor’s text.

 **Victor:** Yuuri’s worried that you really heard us and you weren’t just being a brat. 

 **Yurio:** Tell Katsudon I was just being a shit.  But seriously Victor, can you please just fuck while I’m not there? 

 **Victor:** You’ve certainly changed your tune since Japan!

Yurio snorted a bit as he remembered his embarrassed reaction to finding out Minako was telling Victor not to make Yuuri too sore to compete.  He glanced over at Mila to see she was trying on a few shirts.  Mila knew Yurio was gay, and simply treated him as a girlfriend when it came to trying on clothes.  He was unaffected either way, and simply gave a thumbs up when a shirt looked great on her.

 **Yurio:** I talked to Otabek.  He was the one to point out the two of you were going to need some privacy before you left for Japan again.  Figured just getting it out in the open would be best.

 **Victor:** Ah.  Want me to text you the all clear so we can all watch some movies tonight?

 **Yurio:** Sure, but if it’s too late I’ll just come over and make breakfast.

 **Victor:** That’s so sweet!  You do care <3 <3 <3

          Yurio rolled his eyes.  Victor was so Extra it was ridiculous.

 **Yurio:** Whatever.  If Katsudon wants something that you don’t have there, text me and I’ll pick it up.  Good bye, Victor.

          Yurio tossed his phone to the side and leaned over to give Potya some love.  The cat purred loudly as Mila narrowed down two tops she was trying to decide between.

          “Which one, Yura?” She yanked him up to come stand beside her and look at the tops on his bed.

          Yurio let out a put-upon sigh before pointing out the one he’d thought looked best on her.  Mila shrieked her thanks before grabbing him up in a hug he immediately tried to break free of.

          After putting on the top and primping a bit more, Mila shot him a considering look before stiffening.

          “Yura…does Yakov know you’re having a growth spurt?” she asked suspiciously.

          Feeling his eyes widen, Yurio immediately shushed her.  “Can you tell that much?” he asked while quickly going to make sure neither Yakov nor Lilia was outside his bedroom door.

          Mila pursed her lips and shook her head.  “No, it looks like you’ve grown about an inch, but I’m guessing you’re expecting more?”

          Yurio leaned against the door and felt his shoulders slump.  “It feels like it’s going to be more.  It’s not affecting my skating yet, but I’m afraid of what’s going to happen for Worlds.  I know I can handle the European Championships, but Worlds is still almost three months away.  Mila, what the fuck do I do?”

          Mila walked over to him and pulled him away from the door.  “Let me look at you, Yura.”  She had him change into a tank top and shorts and then had him demonstrate some ballet moves so she could critically see how his body had changed.

          “You’ve gained about an inch in height, but your muscle mass has changed a bit, too.  You’re going to have to tell Yakov and Lilia.  If this keeps up much longer you won’t fit into your costumes,” Mila said with some concern in her voice.

          Yurio flopped onto the bed and breathed in Potya’s fur.  “I know,” he said miserably.  “And I can’t afford new ones.”

          Mila tapped her index finger to her mouth as she thought.  “Have you thought about asking Otabek or Yuuri if you could use one of their old costumes for the rest of this year?  I know it would be hard to match up with your programs, but you might be able to have them altered to fit you.”

          Yurio blinked as he rolled over and thought about that.  Potya decided this would be a good time to come plop on his stomach and he idly ran his fingers down her back.  Mila grinned at the picture the two of them made before grabbing her phone and taking a picture.

          Yurio made a face as she posted the pic on Instagram, but admitted to himself her idea was a good one.  He also knew that Yuuri’s old costumes would fit his Agape program better than Otabek’s, but Beka might have something that would work well for his free skate.

          Nodding, he replied, “Da, I’ll talk to Yakov and ask Katsudon and Otabek about costumes.  But what the hell do I do about my skating, Mila?  I might not be able to get my jumps if I get much taller.”

          Mila chewed her lip as she glanced over her shoulder at him from where she was applying eye makeup in his mirror.  “I hate to break this to you, Yura, but Russian male skaters don’t tend to stay small.  Now that you’re beginning to grow, you’re probably going to grow for a bit.  This may not be the best Worlds for you.”

          Yurio groaned and dropped his head back onto his bed.  He wasn’t prepared for the indignant squawk and scuttle of Potya off his stomach when Mila flopped down on the bed beside him.  She wrapped him in a casual hug and tousled his hair.  “It’s part of it, Yura.  I bet both Yuuri and Victor had the same problem early in their senior careers.”

          Yurio allowed the cuddle as he was feeling pretty shitty at the moment.  He knew Victor had his own growth spurts, but somehow the other skater had managed to keep them from impacting his skating too much.  Then again, Victor had grown gradually, and it didn’t feel as if his body had the same plan.  Maybe he should talk to Yuuri, who had struggled with weight issues his entire career, about what he could do to offset the sudden changes.

 

 

I listened to BTS' [You Never Walk Alone](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jUl3MrspteI) and music from [Fairy Tail Vol 2](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=seMYiW0k6Jk&list=PLHdPjNbfMZylGrsg8T6z_2_dS0XK0umeC) while writing this chapter.

 

If you haven't seen the updated line art intro by [Katsudom](https://wintersblight.tumblr.com/post/163754472008/katsudom) on tumblr, you're totally missing out.  (This is linked from my tumblr, but Katsudom did the amazing intro.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I think I'm going to be able to finish EAP in another 4 chapters. Low occurs during the same time period as EAP in the Podium Family verse, but it doesn't really say when. I've decided to keep the gratuitous sex scenes out of EAP, but there will definitely be some in Part III (which I'm still working on a name for, so if you have any suggestions feel free to throw them at me.) So Part III of Podium Family will have a rating of Explicit. Also, keep an eye on tags for this series. I'll be updating them as stuff that needs to be noted gets written.
> 
> Not beta'd - please let me know if there are any errors :-)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is rated M, but it does get a bit...spicier than it has previously in this chapter. When part III of Podium Family begins it's going to be rated E, so keep that in mind if you don't like explicit scenes. Also, there is discussion of an article done by Teen Vogue in this chapter that discusses the attack and rape of woman. I don't get into any of the details, but I did want to mention it as a trigger warning.

 

The week Victor and Yuuri spent in Japan felt like a whirlwind.  Yuuri made sure Victor spend time in the onsen every day, and he went down to Ice Castle to practice every day.  The days were filled with obtaining the boxes Minako had scoured Hasetsu for before their arrival, filling said boxes, and spending as much time as possible with Makkachin.  Yuuri and Victor had both been through the process of moving internationally, so contacting a company to move their stuff wasn’t a problem.

          Yuuri feeling like he was abandoning his family again was more of a problem.  But Victor was there to help him process through the emotions, and in the end, they decided that Skype would be the best way to stay in contact.  Yuuri was determined not to fall out of his family’s life as he had essentially done in Detroit.

          During the last couple of days in Hasetsu, Yuuri remembered to ask Hiroko about the rice ball program he’d started.  His mother smiled softly.

          “Why, yes we still do that.  I can get some together today if you’d like to make a round before you leave,” she offered with a bright smile.

          Yuuri walked over to hug his mother.  “I’m going to miss you so much,” he said softly.

          Happy tears gathered in her eyes as Hiroko hugged her youngest child.  They stayed that way for a few minutes as Mari and Victor observed them from the door.

          “You know, I don’t remember them hugging this much before he left for Detroit,” Mari said dryly while pulling on a cigarette.  “This is all your fault, Vicchan.”

          Victor kept his eyes on Yuuri while he shrugged.  Mari side-eyed him before shoulder bumping him with a grin.

          “This is an improvement, you idiot!  Yuuri used to be so close mouthed we never knew what was going on inside his head.  I don’t think Mom and Dad would be okay with him leaving again if he wasn’t going with you.”

          Victor nodded a bit tearfully.  “Your dad pulled me aside the other day.  I can’t believe they’ve accepted me the way they have.  Oh, and anytime you want to come and visit just say the word, Mari.  Yuuri and Yurio and I are going to look at starting up some kind of food assistance program for lower income families in Moscow if you’d like to help us plan it.”

          Mari tilted her head in thought as she finished the last of her cigarette.  “That sounds interesting.  I think I’ll wait until the skating season is over to come out and visit, though.  I know how Yuuri gets close to the end of the season and I don’t want to be around a group of skaters.  I think that would just be too intense.”

          Yuuri and Hiroko had begun getting the making for rice balls together as Mari turned to head into another part of the inn.  Victor walked over to Yuuri and wrapped his arms around his fiancé. 

          “Anything I can do to help?” he asked brightly as Hiroko smiled happily at the two of them.  The three of them got the rice balls made and packaged for Yuuri and Victor to deliver.  Victor posted pictures of the deliveries on Instagram, of course.

~*~

          The last week leading up to the European Championships there were no days off for any of the Russian Team.  Although Yakov did insist that they take enough down time to not be too worn out for the competition, they were all on the ice every day.

          Victor and Yuuri were going to fly straight from Hasetsu to Ostrava in the Czech Republic where the Europeans were being held that year.  They were bringing Makkachin and directly afterward everyone was going back to St. Petersburg.  Victor had reserved a suite in the hotel where the Russian team was staying so he and Yuuri could have some privacy. 

          Yurio snorted at Victor’s Instagram post, then turned to address Mila as Yakov was busy with Georgi.  It was always a relief when someone else was getting yelled at for a change.

          “Hey Mila, didn’t you tell me you read some article in one of your magazines about some girl who did some stuff to get back to running again after she was attacked?”

          Mila frowned over at him before her face lit with understanding.  She turned into a stretch before facing him again.  “You’re talking about that article I read about the girl who’d been raped while running and then had trouble running after?”

          Yurio frowned.  “I think so.  She would panic any time she tried running after that, yeah?”

          Mila nodded as she skated over so they could talk without shouting at each other.  “Yes, I can find it for you if you want.  Why are you interested in that?” she asked curiously.

          Yurio glanced over to make sure Yakov was still occupied.  He worked himself into stretch while they were talking.  “I think you said there were a couple of things the girl did in that article that might help Yuuri.  I wanted to check them out online before we run into them again at Europeans.”

          Mila quirked a grin at her younger cohort.  “You’re getting more comfortable with him, aren’t you, Yura?  Going to start calling him Yuuri, soon?”  She grinned as the blonde practically hissed at her.

          Yurio’s face flamed as he glared.  “Shut up, Mila.  Victor said before they left that they’re both looking for ways to deal with their shit and I thought that article might help.  Neither of them want to go on psych meds and I’m pretty good at finding stuff online, so I told the old man I’d help him.”

          “Mila!” Yakov roared from across the ice.  “Europeans aren’t going to win themselves, you know.”

          Mila startled and skated over to Yakov.  Disgruntled, Yurio took a gulp of his water before moving out to work on some of his step sequences.  He still couldn’t get them as well as Yuuri and it bothered him.  Of course, with his body in the middle of a growth spurt, his steps were really the least of his problems.  But for now, until his jumps became a problem, he’d concentrate on them.

          As they were wrapping up practice, Mila sidled up to him and they companionably took off their skates.  She side bumped him and smiled before saying, “I’ll see if I can find that article.  I think I’ve still got that magazine, if not we might be able to Google it.”

          Now that she wasn’t teasing him, Yurio was able to relax.  “Thanks, Mila.  I can’t remember the names of those things that girl tried, but it sounded like they might help athletes as well.”

          Mila rolled her shoulders as she stood up, then stretched her neck to one side and the other.  “It can’t hurt.  If Yuuri can really work on his anxiety he’s going to rival Victor at the World’s this year.”

          Yurio nodded.  “I’d love to see Katsudon hand Victor his ass.  But you’re right, he’s got to be able to focus better than he does at competitions.  I wish I could figure out how to get him as focused as he is for practice.”  Yurio glanced away thinking, _My World’s is going to be a wreck this year with this fucking growth spurt._

          Mila snorted.  “You and Victor both.  He’d be unstoppable if he didn’t get so upset at competitions.”

          Yakov walked over to the two of them.  “It’s time to head out, you two.  Mila, do you want to ride with us in the van?”

          She nodded.  “Yes, Coach Yakov.  What time are we meeting back here tomorrow?”

          Yakov made a face.  “Tommorrow we’re practicing in the afternoon, but then we’re back to mornings until we leave for Ostrava.  Make sure you’re getting plenty of rest, Mila.  That boyfriend of yours takes up too much of your time before a competition.”

          Yurio watched as Mila made a face.  “I’m between boyfriends right now, so that’s not a problem.  I’ve been Skyping with Sara Crispino, but neither of us stay up too late before a major competition.  I’ll be ready when it’s time,” she promised with a cheeky grin.

          Yurio followed the others out to the van and reminded himself it wouldn’t be much longer before the competition.  He fully intended to take gold, especially since he knew that Worlds could be really hard for him this year.  Lilia was staying behind to care for Potya this time, as he really hated to board his cat.  Just a few more days and he’d be on his way to the Czech Republic.  Yurio very pointedly didn’t think about Beka being there, too.

~*~

          Yuuri and Victor arrived in Ostrava the day before their teammates.  Victor had wanted a day to themselves as he knew how the jet lag affected Yuuri.  Yuuri had predictably napped for several hours after they’d checked into their suite, so Victor had taken Makkachin out for a long walk.

          As he made his way back into the suite with Makka, Victor heard the sound of the shower from the bedroom.  After setting out some food, water, and toys for Makka in the living area of the suite, Victor made his way into the bedroom and closed the door behind him.  While Hasetsu always felt like home, staying at the family inn meant the two of them kept quiet when it came to sex. 

          Knocking on the bathroom door to let Yuuri know he was back, Victor stuck his head in.  Yuuri peeked around the curtain of the shower and grinned at Victor.

          “Hey, you.  Did you have a nice walk with Makka?”

          Victor smiled back, admiring how the steam and hot water looked on Yuuri.  “I did.  How much longer do you think you’ll be in there?”

          Yuuri tilted his head at the slight change in Victor’s voice.  “I’m almost finished.  Are we going somewhere?”

          Victor took in a deep breath and pushed his thumbs into his front pockets.  “Not if I have anything to do with it,” he mumbled.  “I’ll be waiting for you in the bedroom.  I’ve put Makka in the front with some food and toys,” he added before he turned to make his way out of the bathroom.

          Victor took off his scarf and coat, then toed his shoes off to go lay down on the bed to await Yuuri.  He hadn’t bothered to get two beds as they both knew they’d be using the single bed for more than sleeping while they were here.  Any time spent with Yurio would be spent out in the living area, so the bedroom was their private space during this trip.

          Hearing the water turn off, Victor lazily opened his eyes to watch Yuuri’s entrance.  Watching the Japanese man saunter into the bedroom with only a towel around his hips was one of Victor’s favorite things, and he was unable to keep a small noise from escaping at the sight.

          Yuuri took in the sight of Victor waiting on the bed for him before climbing onto the end of the bed.  Oh, so slowly he made his way up Victor’s body, keeping his eyes on Victor’s but touching nothing else.  Victor was practically whimpering by the time Yuuri reached his face.

          “Hmmm?  What would you like, Vitya?” Yuuri let his head fall down so he could murmur against the side of Victor’s neck before quickly licking and nipping the same area.

          Victor was practically beside himself.  It had been some time since they’d gotten really frisky since his injury, and now they didn’t have to hold back.  But the look on Yuuri’s face promised a long experience rather than a quickie.

          “Just touch me, I don’t care what you do,” Victor gasped as Yuuri smiled against the back of his ear.

          “But you have so many clothes on, Vitya.  How can I touch you when you have so much on?” the man currently bent on giving Victor a heart attack questioned.

          Yuuri pulled back to grin as Victor sat up and hurriedly divested himself of his sweater and tee shirt.  When Victor’s hands fell to the button on his slacks, Yuuri pushed his hands away.  “I’ll handle it from here,” he said while moving to do exactly that.

          Victor could tell Yuuri was in the mood to draw everything out, which normally he loved, but his skin felt as if it were on fire.  “Yuuri, please,” he gasped as the dark-haired man took his time pulling the zipper down before parting the slacks to pull them down.

          “So impatient, Vitya,” Yuuri practically purred as he sat up to pull the slacks, underwear, and Victor’s socks off.  After setting Victor’s foot back down, Yuuri made his leisurely way over to the nightstand where they’d stashed lube and condoms earlier.  When they weren’t at home they used condoms more to keep the mess to a minimum.

          “What are you going to do to me,” Victor whimpered as he waited for Yuuri to come back to him.  Trying to rush Yuuri when he was in this mood wouldn’t do any good, as he’d learned, so Victor did his very best to be patient while he waited for the love of his life to finish torturing him.

          Moving languidly, Yuuri pulled two condoms off the strip he’d pulled out.  “Well, first, I’m going to put a condom on each of us.  Then I’m going to kiss you while we’re frotting and you’re going to come.  After that, I’m going to get you ready so I can fuck you the way you like, then we might order some food before I fuck you again.  How does that sound, Vitya?”

          Victor’s eyes rolled back in his head as he felt Yuuri’s hands fitting the condom onto him.  He loved it when Yuuri took charge in this way, and Yuuri knew him well enough to know he needed the release giving in to Yuuri like this gave him. 

          Victor felt Yuuri settle against him before the smaller man’s breath brushed his lips.  “Vitya, look at me.”

          Victor blinked his eyes open to see Yuuri patiently waiting for him.  “Or would you rather do something else?” Yuuri asked with a smile.   

          “No,” Victor breathed.  “No, I want what you said,” he gasped into Yuuri’s mouth as it met his.

          “Mmmm, good.  We’re not at the inn anymore, Vitya, so you can be as loud as you want,” Yuuri said softly before taking Victor’s mouth again.  Victor cried out as Yuuri pulled away from firmly inspecting Victor’s mouth with his tongue.  Victor’s brain stopped working as he felt Yuuri’s hand enclose them both before beginning to stroke just the way they both liked.  His Yuuri always knew how to take care of him when he was wound tight.  Thankfully, they had the rest of the day before anyone else would want their attention.  With a strangled cry, Victor moved further into Yuuri’s embrace. 

Yuuri chuckled softly against the side of his mouth.  “So needy, Vitya.  I can’t wait to get our new place at home.”

Yuuri knew talking about their new home was something Victor loved, and right now Victor needed to be in the right head space.  He smiled as Victor whimpered and came in his hand.  Taking Victor apart was one of his favorite things to do to his fiancé.

~*~

Mila had managed to find the article in a Teen Vogue issue from 2016.  Yurio read it at the airport, then began making notes about things he wanted to look up online.  The article had mentioned the girl who was attacked used two things that had seemed to help her:  neurofeedback and EMDR. 

After they all checked into their hotel rooms, Yurio checked to see what time he was supposed to be going over to Victor’s suite.  He still had some time, so grabbing his laptop he connected to the hotel’s wi-fi.  Yakov glanced over from where he was unpacking, but left the teen to himself.

Opening his browser, Yurio immediately went to Google.  There were lots of search engines, but he’d found Google to be the most accurate for the things he usually looked for.  Typing in neurofeedback, Yurio looked at the top returns.

The top hit that wasn’t an ad ended up being an American site called eeginfo.com.  Yurio opened the link to see what was listed and ended up reading articles and watching videos until it was time to go meet up with Victor and Yuuri.  So far, this neurofeedback looked promising, but he wasn’t sure if he'd be able to find a provider outside of the United States.  Shrugging, Yurio made a note on his list of stuff to check out if there were providers for neurofeedback in Russia. 

Grabbing his hoodie, Yurio threw a glance over to Yakov, who had settled onto his own bed to read a book until they were all going to meet for food.

“Hey, I’m going over to Victor and Yuuri’s room.  Where are we supposed to be meeting later?”

Yakov sighed.  “Georgi’s looking over possibilities and will let me know when he’s found something.  I’ll text you the information when I get it, Yuri.  Have a good time with Vitya,” Yakov called as Yurio lifted a hand over his shoulder before exiting the room

 

Here's the link for the [Teen Vogue](http://www.teenvogue.com/story/rape-survivor-run-half-marathon) article if anyone wants to read it.  Neurofeedback is a form of brain training that helps to settle down dysregulation within the central nervous system.  It can make huge differences in symptoms for anxiety, depression, PTSD, the autism spectrum, peak performance for athletes, and seizures.  More information on neurofeedback can be found [here.](http://www.eeginfo.com/what-is-neurofeedback.jsp)

 

While writing this chapter I listened to Sawano Hiroyuki (nzk) volume 01.  Their Youtube channel is [here.](https://www.youtube.com/user/SawanoHiroyukiSMEJ/featured)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to try to get the next chapter done by the end of September, but my kids go back to school next week and it's always INSANE the first couple of weeks they go back to school. So keep that in mind.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I double checked the YOI wikia which does list Yuri Plisetsky as being 16 at the end of the GPF. So, with his birthday being in March, he'll be turning 17 in 2017. Also, I had to look up which countries went to Europeans and the Four Continents, because my dumb ass was going to have Otabed competing at Europeans which...doesn't actually happen. Thank you brain for wanting this to be somewhat accurate.
> 
> Also, I just used Google to look up the Russian for sunlight, so if someone who speaks Russian reads this and notices it's wrong, please let me know so I can fix that.

Special thanks to [imaginarydragonling](http://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginary_dragonling) for helping me get motivated to working on this again.

 

Round three had required a shower taken afterward, but Victor was feeling extra mellow, and Yuuri looked about as relaxed as he got away from home.  They were nibbling on the rest of the room service when there was an imperious knock on the suite’s door.  Makka walked over to the door and barked before looking back as if to say, ‘Well open it already.’

Yuuri raised an eyebrow as Victor walked over to open the door.  Neither of them were very surprised to see Yurio on the other side, but Victor did open his mouth only to snap it suddenly shut at the younger Russian walked into the room.

“Have you told Yakov yet?” were the words Yurio heard as he leaned down to offer Makka some pets.

Yurio huffed out an annoyed breath.  “Did you tell him, Katsudon?”

Before Yuuri could say anything, Victor broke in with annoyance.  “I can see perfectly well that you’re two inches taller, Yuri.  Now answer my question.”

Yuuri sat his laptop onto the small table in front of the couch as Yurio’s shoulders drooped.  “No, I haven’t told him yet.  I wanted to get through the Europeans first.”

Victor frowned at Yurio’s words.  “What’s going on that he hasn’t noticed already?  He knew I was growing before I did when I hit.”

Yuuri had crossed the living area to sit a few inches away from Yurio to get Makka’s attention.  As he lavished attention on the ecstatic dog, Yurio wrapped his arms around his legs and rested his head against the tops of his knees.  “He’s been talking to Lilia more lately.  They’ve even been talking on the phone since we got here.”

Victor’s eyebrows rose in astonishment.  “Really?  That’s interesting…but he should still have noticed.”

Yuuri spoke up quietly.  “You’ve been wearing bigger clothing than usual, haven’t you?”

Yurio lifted his head to smile tiredly at Yuuri.  “I learned from watching you and some of the others when you were going through growth spurts.  If the clothes are bigger it’s harder to notice at first.”

Yuuri nodded in understanding, still petting Makka.  “What can we do to help, Yurio?”

Burrowing his face in his knees again, Yurio shook his head.  “I don’t fucking know.  I’m just trying to get through this competition, but then I don’t know what to do.  I can already tell it’s going to fuck my jumps up, but I don’t know what to focus on and I don’t want to bother Yakov when he’s getting along with Lilia so well.”

Victor plopped down on the other side of Yuuri and Makka to join in giving Makka all the attention he’d missed while they were gone.  “Well, I didn’t have an extreme body change, but I know Yuuri’s dealt with some body changes and still managed to skate very well…” Victor trailed off as he turned to look at Yuuri in question.

Before the two Russians had descended on Hasetsu, this topic would have had Yuuri red faced in embarrassment and trying to physically exit the conversation.  As it was now, he simply leaned back on his hands and shot Victor a look of irritated affection.

“Of course you didn’t have a huge change in body mass.  I think the Universe actively works with you and against me sometimes,” Yuuri muttered.  With a sigh, he turned to address Yurio.  “The biggest thing that’s going to change is your balance.  I always adjusted from the basics up, so I’d get my figures and footwork back up, then work on spins and jumps.  And we can both help you if you’d like, but the main thing is you can’t stop your body from changing.  Fighting it isn’t going to help either you or your skating.”

Yurio groaned and threw himself onto the floor.  “I know that, but I wanted to have the best senior debut and this is going to fuck it all up!”

Makka got up from between Yuuri and Victor to go bestow doggie kisses on the unsuspecting Yurio.  As he laughingly fended off Makka, Yurio wiggled back into a sitting position.  He met Yuuri’s troubled expression with a determined one of his own.

“Look, we all have to concentrate hard this season or J.J. is going to kick all of our asses, and that is simply not acceptable.  I’ll take whatever advice you two have as long as you’re working just as hard on your own programs.  Speaking of,” he glanced over at Victor.  “I may have found something that will help all of us.”

Victor sat up in interest while Yuuri simply waited.  Yurio glanced over at Yuuri before gesturing toward his laptop.  “Do you mind if I use that, Katsudon?”

Yuuri nodded and they all moved over to the couch to see what Yurio was going to show them on the laptop.  Yuuri unlocked his laptop and handed it over to Yurio, who was sitting in the middle of their little group so everyone could see.

Opening the browser, Yurio went to the eeginfo site again.  He navigated to the What is neurofeedback tab and pointed at the first paragraph.

“Let me know when you’re done reading that,” he said as he sat back.  The other two leaned forward to read, and Yurio relaxed.  Once they were done, he moved further down the page to show them the What condition can it help section.  Yuuri made a small noise that sounded interested when he read that neurofeedback helped with stress, anxiety, and peak performance.

“Okay,” Victor said slowly.  “But this is all based in the United States, yes?  Do we even have access to it in Russia?”

“That’s what we’re about to find out,” Yurio muttered as he opened another tab for a Google search.  Quickly he typed in neurofeedback Europe into the search bar and got a return for Eeg Info Europe.  Opening the link Yurio glanced around and saw the find a provider tab.  Clicking on it and scrolling down provided a map of all the European providers. 

Eyes widening, Yurio stated quietly, “There’s one in Moscow.”

Yuuri stared at the map before turning to look at Victor.  “Wouldn’t it interfere with our training schedule?”

Victor narrowed his eyes and tapped a finger against his lip as he thought about it.  “Not if we scheduled during our down days.  But it would mean we’d have to spend the entire day in Moscow.  And we may have to have our down days back to back, but if it works, it would definitely be worth it.”

Yuuri chewed his bottom lip as he turned back to the laptop screen.  “How did you find out about this, Yurio?”

“Mila reads Teen Vogue and there was an article that mentioned it.  There was another thing it mentioned, too, but I haven’t looked into it yet.”

Yuuri nodded in acknowledgment while Victor leaned forward to peer at the map again.  He got up to go grab a notebook from the bedroom while Yuuri peered curiously at Yurio.

“I didn’t realize you were that interested in peak performance training, Yurio,” Yuuri stated before leaning over to pet Makka again.

Yurio ground his teeth together in an effort to keep from blushing.  There was no way he was going to tell Yuuri he’d looked into it to help with his anxiety.  Thankfully, Victor swept back into the room with a cheeky grin. 

“Oh, you know Yurio.  Anything to keep J.J. from getting the upper hand.”

~*~

The top three after the men’s short program were Yurio, Chris, and Georgi, which was no great surprise to Victor.  The Four Continents were going to be interesting, since Yuuri, Phichit, J.J., and Otabek would all be competing, but so far, the Europeans were going exactly as Victor had expected.  Yuuri had watched him long enough with a troubled expression for Victor to finally glance over and ask what was bothering him.

“Are you upset you’re not competing?” Yuuri asked quietly.

Victor shook his head with a smile.  “If I have any chance of skating well against you at Worlds I need this time to heal.  And I do mean to skate well against you, Solnechnyy luchik.”

Yuuri’s brow furrowed at him.  “What does that mean, anyway?”

Yuuri’s eyebrows rose at the slight blush that stole over Victor’s cheeks before he rubbed his thumb over Yuuri’s hand.  “It means sunlight.  Does it bother you?”

“No, I just didn’t know what you were saying,” Yuuri answered with a quiet smile.

They were sitting at a couple of large tables the restaurant had pulled together for all of them.  Otabek had flown in to support Yurio, and the two were practically inseparable among the other skaters.  Their table consisted of Chris and his boyfriend, the Crispino twins, the entire Russian team, Yuuri, and Emil.  It was quite the rambunctious group, with Emil keeping Mickey occupied so Mila and Sara could whisper together.  Georgi kept himself busy texting his current girlfriend, but he was happy enough to participate in the conversation as well.

Yuuri’s phone dinged with a text from Phichit asking Yuuri to post a pic of everyone on Instagram.  He texted Phichit back, before glancing over at Victor. 

“Do you think we could get Yakov or someone to take a pic of all of us?  Phichit isn’t going to leave me alone until he sees that we’re having fun.”

Victor glanced over to see Yakov on his phone.  “I think he’s talking to Lilia again, let me go see who else is over there.”

Victor got up and approached the coaches’ table with a charming smile.  Yuuri shook his head with a small smile of his own as Victor worked his magic.  Before long one of the assistant coaches was standing at the end of their table taking the picture.

Yuuri made sure to thank her with a smile of his own before turning back to Victor, who had grabbed for his hand again as soon as he sat back down.

“It always amazes me how good you are with people,” Yuuri said softly.

“Hmm?” Victor glanced over to the coaches’ table again.  “Oh that?  That’s just my public face.  I don’t enjoy it, but I can do it because it’s what I did for years.  None of them know me like you do, my Yuuri.”

Yuuri smiled as he ran his fingers over the ring on Victor’s finger.  “How soon can we leave without it seeming impolite?”

Victor frowned at him.  “I thought you were having a good time?”

Yuuri leaned forward and lowered his voice.  “I’d rather have a better time in our suite, if you know what I mean.”  He leveled a provocative glance at Victor which led to Victor clearing his throat and getting up to let Chris know they’d be leaving soon.

Chris took one look at Victor’s face and burst out laughing.  “Of course, you’re leaving early!  I knew there was a reason you got a suite away from everyone else, chere.  Have fun, you two!”

Yuuri blushed slightly, but waved at Chris as they got ready to leave.  Victor walked up behind Yurio and Otabek, leaning over them to say something quietly.

Otabek nodded while Yurio hissed angrily like a cat.  Yuuri gave Victor an inquiring look as they walked to the elevator.  Victor grinned before saying, “I told them not to do anything that would negatively influence Yurio’s skate.”

~*~

After the dinner had wrapped up, Otabek and Yurio went up to Otabek’s room for a bit.  Beka had brought his gaming console with him and they played Dota 2 for a while.  As they sat companionably on the bed, Otabek casually questioned how things were going with ‘the Russian fam’ as he called Victor, Yuuri, Mila, Yakov, Georgi, Lilia, and Yuri.

Yurio blew his bangs out of his face.  “They’re all good.  Victor and Katsudon are banging like they think the rooms gonna blow up or something, and Yakov is spending all his free time talking to Lilia.  Mila is up to something, but I don’t know what it is yet.”

“And Georgi?” Otabek kept his eyes on the game they were playing since Yurio didn’t talk about Georgi as frequently as the others.

“He’s got a new girlfriend, so he’s fine.  I didn’t think he was ever going to stop crying about Anya, but he seems to be over her for the moment.”

Otabek sat quietly for a few minutes before asking, “Have you spoken to Yuuri about the panic attack yet?”

Yurio made a face before pausing the game.  “I really don’t know how to bring it up without making him feel bad.  I know he and Victor have had all these heart to hearts about it, and I don’t think I need to barge in there, you know?  I did find a new treatment option for all three of us in Moscow, so I feel pretty good about helping out on that end.”

Otabek made an understanding sound.  “Do you feel okay about it now?  You were really upset before…”

Yurio sat the controller down impatiently as he tried to think about what he wanted to say.  “I don’t think Katsudon ever blamed me for what happened the way I did.  He was angrier at himself and no one can hold a grudge against himself like Yuuri Katsuki can.  And now that I’ve found something that I think will actually help, I’m feeling a lot better about the whole thing.”

Otabek glanced over at the clock before nodding over at it.  “You’re going to have to head back soon, Yura.”

Yurio made a face at the clock.  “I can’t believe Victor said that,” he growled lowly.

Otabek laughed softly.  “Well, considering what he’s always doing with Yuuri, it makes all kinds of sense.  Although I doubt he knows we don’t do anything,” he added lightly.

Yurio side-eyed Otabek before clearing his throat.  “You know I turn seventeen in March,” he began.

“No pressure, Yura.  If and when you’re ready for anything we’ll talk about it.  But for now, just concentrate on the free skate tomorrow, okay?”

Swallowing, Yurio looked down at the bedspread.  “Yeah, okay.  I’ll see you tomorrow?” he asked as he stood and grabbed his shoes to put them on.

Otabek walked him to the door and shot him a small smile as he walked past.  “Do you really think I flew all this way to not spend time with you, Yura?”

Yurio felt his face flame.  “See you tomorrow, Beka,” he stuttered out before turning to walk to the room he shared with Yakov.

Otabek stood in the doorway and watched until Yurio turned into the small hallway where the elevator was.  Then he quietly closed the door and got ready for bed himself.

~*~

It was no real surprise that the medalists were Yurio, Chris, and Georgi in that order.  What Yuuri and Victor were both wondering was which exhibition skate Yurio was going to do.  Otabek was here, so technically he could do Welcome to the Madness again.  Yurio appeared to be considering which of his exhibition programs to skate to, until Yakov walked up with his cell phone.

Yurio scowled at Yakov before grabbing the phone, “Da?”

Lilia’s amused voice answered him.  “You might as well do your new exhibition since Otabek is there as well.  When you get to Worlds if you make the podium we’ll make that decision then, Yura.  I know you’re worried about upsetting me by not skating the program I choreographed for you, but you had such fun skating the other one I say go for it.”

Yurio gaped at the phone before pulling it back to his face.  “Are you sure?”

“Yes, go and have fun,” her relaxed voice answered him as he blinked over at Yakov.

Yakov allowed him a small smile as his phone was handed back to him.  Yurio blinked after him as he walked away before immediately picking up his own phone to text Victor.

 **Yurio:** Old man, take advantage of Yakov’s good mood.  This whole thing with him and Lilia getting back together is making him smile?!?

 **Victor:** Good.  I wasn’t any help to him when they split, so I’ll do what I can to keep things smooth if they’re getting back together.  Don’t screw this up for him, Yuri.

 **Yurio:** I wouldn’t!  I want them both happy, too, asshole.

 **Victor:** When we get home you should come and help us look for the new place.  You’re going to move in with us sooner than we expected, I think.

 **Yurio:** Da.  But we need to soundproof the bedrooms, cuz I don’t want to hear you two all night.

Yurio snorted at the flustered, then laughing emojis Victor sent back to him.  He was serious about the soundproofing, though.  He wasn’t sure what he’d do if he ever heard the two of them having sex.  Now that the decision on which exhibition to skate was done, Yurio grabbed his things to head over to Otabek’s room until it was time to get ready.

 

BTS had a new album drop on September 18 and I listened to that sucker on loop to finish this chapter.  You can hear it [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exZ90sS1YK8) until Youtube takes it down.  There's also a hidden track called [sea](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSAlPMX1ixU) which you should listen to, as well.

 

There is a site for neurofeedback based in Europe if anyone is interested in [that](http://www.eeginfo-europe.com/).

 

My [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/wintersblight) and [Ko-fi](https://www.ko-fi.com/wintersblight) if anyone is interested.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up that I'm going to be working on my other WIPS as well over the Fall/Winter so this series isn't going to be updated as often. Also, I'm still trying to get the title for part 3, so if anyone has any ideas hit me up. Seriously, I don't want to grab another episode name for part 3.

**Author's Note:**

> As these chapters keep getting longer on word count, the number of chapters may go down from 12 to 9 or 10. But there will definitely be more coming as the darn thing has turned itself into a series. Thanks, brain, I really appreciate that.
> 
> Please don't send me comments asking when I'm going to update. I will update if and when I have the time as I'm raising 3 kiddos and have multiple WIPs in different fandoms. Any kudos or other comments are always appreciated. Thanks for reading!


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